Hope desperately needed after MMC and TFMR

[Tess86]

I really hope I've posted this in the right place as the last thing I want to do is upset anyone.

I had a mmc in June and now I'm having a tfmr for a rare chromosome deletion. I'm beyond heartbroken. My DH and I went to the scan just praying for a heartbeat. I'm feeling really hopeless at the moment. I found it difficult to cope last time but I got pregnant within two months and so was able to focus on that.

I guess I am just hoping that there are women out there who have been in a similar position and got their rainbow at the end of it. At the moment, I just feel like a complete failure. :(

Oh sweetheart im so sorry for your losses. You are in no way a failure. It's so hard to go through though, so please try to be kind to yourself.

Fwiw, my 2yr old rainbow is currently sitting on the sofa reading (she should be napping!) I hope you have happier times coming soon

So sorry.

Yes, of course, there are lots of us!

Take care of yourself and seek support online and in RL if you need it - I personally found counselling v helpful.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I had the same but the other way round, a tfmr at 22 weeks for T18 and then a mmc at 14 weeks.

I am very lucky to already have dd1 before we lost dd2 and ds. I have decided to stop ttc. It has taken a huge toll on my mental health and I am recovering from ptsd at the moment.

However, I know a lot of women in the baby loss community who have been through similar and gone on the have their rainbow.

💐 Be kind to yourself. Sands and ARC are both brilliant charities to support you

Thank you all for your kind words. The desire to have a child has been greater than anything I've felt before. The prospect of it not happening is terrifying. I know have to remain positive but I'm always the pessimist.

I'm really sorry to hear that you have suffered with ptsd, Kitty. I have enquired about a local miscarriage support group and am going to attend next month. X

I had 10 years of infertility, a miscarriage, a daughter with trisomy 18 (we chose to continue the pregnancy) who died in January aged three months and now I'm 36 weeks with baby 3 who so far looks absolutely fine. There is such a good chance you will get your baby.

I spent the early months of this pregnancy convinced I would miscarry, that this baby would have a rare anomaly, actually I'm still spending my time worrying about stillbirth despite a good scan this morning but really it is all looking positive. There are so many stories of multiple losses and then successful pregnancies. I will keep my fingers crossed for you.

Wow, Disillusioned that's amazing news. I didn't know. Huge, huge congrats. I'm crying now

Thank you for your message Dissillusioned. I'm so sorry that you went through that but it sounds like your going to meet your rainbow soon. X