I am 35, married with dd (4+11) and ds (2+9). DH and I decided last summer that we wanted to try for dc3. I came off the pill last August. Nothing happened, plenty of disappointment at the bfn each month.
We went on holiday at the start of Sept and near the end of the holiday dh was uneasy in bed and (sorry if tmi) pulled out at the crucial moment and said he was scared about having another baby.
Since we came home I have been having cramps way before af due, and feeling exhausted. Mentioned to dh that this could be due to me finally being pg and asked if he was ok with that. He gave me a hug and kiss and told me it'd be fine, we already have 2 fab kids, if this one was half as good as them etc etc.
Anyway, I got my bfp and was feeling overwhelmed but excited. WHen I told dh he was shocked. He is pressing me for a termination as he feels this child is "one more than he wants". I am devastated as this is my last chance but at the same time I see his point. DH is terrified he will be exhausted and may lose his job (he is self employed in a manual job) and he thinks it will be too much for me.
I am so confused and my feelings change by the hour. Sometimes I really want the baby, other times I think dh is right. I am scared that if I don't have it then I will become bitter and start to avoid my pregnant friends and to feel jealous of them.
Does anyone have any advice please?