Can T18 happen again - I am so scared?

[Gooldy]

A brief history, I attended a routine 12w scan last Dec 2009 to be told all was not well, baby's tummy hadn't closed up and main organs were outside, they predicted T18. Follwoing day had a CVS with top consultant in FMU and he said 99% sure T18 and non-viable baby. My world cam crashing down.
We decided after all medical advice to terminate as chances of our little girl surving pregnancy were almost non existent.

6 months on I am pregnant again 9w+3, I have a CVS booked on 12 August (11w+4)whch will also be first tummy scan (dating scan done at 6w).

I am petrified and feel so negative I feel that it's going to happen all over again is this likely? I am 38 years and have a healty 11 year old from previous relationship, first baby with my partner now.

Any advice or support greatly appreciated at this very anxious time (sad)

Hi Gooldy. I'm so sorry to hear about your loss last year but congratulations on your pregnancy! I do know exactly what you're going through having just been for my 12 week scan on my first surviving pregnancy since a Downs diagnosis last year. And yes - all is well. It is possible for chromosomal problems to happen more than once, but usually its genuinely just bad luck - so would therefore be much more likely to be fine the next time. I could talk to you about this all day. What you've said there is what I've said a hundred times. But more importantly, its what the ladies on the pregnancy support thread in this area (here) say all the time so I'd urge you to come across and join us. There are a few other women on there at exactly the same stage as you after terminating for various chromosomal or developmental problems, so we're kind of all in it together at the moment. We can't fix it for you, but you might find it reassuring that at least you're not the only one feeling like you do. xx

LittlePoot thank you so much for your words and understanding I guess at times like this you do think it is just you feeling like this and tend to forget there are others going through the same. I will certainly be joining you all on the thread you mentioned. I am so anxious and knowing others understand how I am feeling really does help.

Great news on your positive scan I so want to be able to say the same in two weeks time!

xx

i had the same thing this year, the tummy not closed, and i couldve of handled that it could be treated but no the gods didnt like me and my very much wanted baby had edwards

Gooldy - I am so sorry to hear about your loss and congrats to you pregnancy.
Could you ask for a scan in between? Even if they can't see much, it might be
reassuring?

Hi Gooldy - I have a daughter with a rare chromosome order and was told that my chances of having another child with the same condition (or in fact any other chromosome abnormality) was no higher than for anyone else i.e. the fact that it happened once didn't make it any more likely to happen again.

I also know someone who lost a T18 baby at about 15 weeks and her next pregnancy was absolutely fine and resulted in a healthy little girl.

I hope this is a little bit reassuring. I do understand how scared you must be and I hope you get the reassurance you want at your scan. Good luck!

My husband is a geneticist. When I worry about these sorts of things he reminds me that the woman is born with her eggs, which is very different from the man whose sperm are copied every 21 days and reproduced... so if a sperm develops a mutation that leads to a rare chromosomal normality, there is a higher chance of getting that same mutation problem again, as the mutated sperm gets copied (often the risk actually increases there, as many mutated sperm also develop faster speeds and can be more hardy than regular sperm, making them more likely to fertilise the egg). By contrast, the woman's eggs are mutated by aging, so if one developed a chromosomal abnormality there is absolutely no reason that the same thing should happen again. That doesn't mean a different abnormality might not occur, but that can happen to anyone. So please, try not to worry :-) Good luck!

Hi Gooldy. I can't help you much but I had a termination for Edward's four weeks ago and am going to try to conceive again. I too have a healthy child. I've just been told by my consultant that I have a 1% chance of any chromosomal problem happening again (I am also 38) and similar to you I will be scanned at 8 weeks and CVS-ed at 11 weeks.
I imagine it will inevitably be a hugely anxious time but all I can say is that it's very very unlikely it will happen to you again and go and see the 'pregnant after termination thread' for lots of positive stories and support from people in the same boat, if you think it will help.

Good luck
x

Hi Gooldy, I am now 24wks pregnant following a termination for T21 last year and know exactly how you are feeling. I've found though that experiencing a pregnancy 'going wrong' does change things and make the next one a much more stressful experience all round. The first twelve weeks were particularly hard and I couldn't allow myself to even think or talk about being pregnant. I think that having the CVS is a good idea so you'll get a definitive answer and then hopefullybe able to relax and start enjoying your pregnancy

I've recently had the all clear from the initial results of an amnio and am only just now allowing myself to start thinking about the slightest possibility of there actually being a baby at the end of this pregnancy and even then sometimes worry that I am jinxing things. I think inevitably another pregnancy is going to be an anxious time but there are plenty of happy stories out there so try to stay as positive as possible . Good luck with the CVS and keep us updated.

Hi Gooldy,

Wow - your story sounds identical to mine; the same time lines, the same issues with little one. We lost our baby in March and are ttc again now, and my biggest fear is that fate will deal us another blow......

But....the chances of this crap, horrible, heartbreaking thing happening to you again is very, very low. I know the 'tunnel of doom'; thoughts start flying around your head, then the pit of your stomach goes, everything goes all fuzzy and all you want to do is sob? It's natural. But please, please try to be positive. There is so much more chance that the only news you will get is 'everything's fine, enjoy your pregnancy'. There are so many stories here and on other threads of women who have gone through this and come out the other side with a happy healthy baby, while never forgetting the little ones that have also been lost.

I really hope you can get through the next few weeks till your clear CVS comes through. Can I suggest comfort food, box sets of dvd's, some retail therapy, a new lip balm, (cheap and always works for me!) and support here whenever you need it. I look forward to your story being one of the many positive ones that gives hope and comfort to others xxx