Im not really sure what im expecting with this post, I feel like im writing this as a vessel for my feelings but would love some advice...
Im 5 months postpartum with my second baby. He's a super chilled baby but has hit a sleep regression and is waking every hour, will now only contact nap. He's also started refusing a bottle and dummy and just wants boob all the time (normal for babies, I know)
I absolutely love my baby, I know I do. But I don't feel as strong a bond this time around.
I also feel so sad and guilty that I don't get to spend quality time with my first, they're becoming increasingly attached to their dad and I just miss them so much.
Im so tired I feel myself getting really frustrated with the baby, snapping at my toddler and partner and think often about just leaving.
I feel like im loosing my sanity, and don't know how to make this situation any better. I cant leave the baby because they won't have a bottle.
I just feel so sad.
Is this PND or sleep deprivation?