I’m 18 weeks pregnant, and we’re planning all the stuff we need to do in preparation for the baby arriving.
For context my mum died 2 years ago and I fully expect having a new baby will bring up some grief, but that’s normal and I fully expect that. I was pretty down after she died, but saw a doctor and went to grief councilling and proactively got the help I needed. I’ve never had any other history with mental health or depression.
My partner yesterday however was like we need to plan for you having ppd, and make arrangements or put a plan in place for when you get it. He also said I was more likely to get it than not. Along with if we need to research day care options as he thinks I may struggle with the 4 days alone with the baby on mat leave.
I’m a pretty capable person, that is also quite resilient and goes with the flow. I have lots of kids in my family and friends with kids, so I’m not naively going into this. So whilst I agree it’s something to be mindful of and conscious that it could happen, I don’t think behaving as if it’s definitely going to happen, or living with that negative mindset is helpful at all. I feel as if he’s just assuming the worst and not giving me any benefit of the doubt.
I’m pretty hurt and saddened by this, I’m not sure what I’m asking for here, I guess some advice on if I’m being the arsehole for not wanting to plan for this, as if it’s definitely going to happen. To me it feels like he’s projecting his anxiety into me, as he’s quite an anxious person and has issues with anxiety. But again I’m I reading this wrong with pregnancy hormones?!