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Antenatal/postnatal depression

Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.

Confused and feeling extremely guilty PPD?

2 replies

Itwasneverjustaphase · 22/12/2024 19:39

Hi all, this is my first post on here so I apologise if something isn't quite right. I had my beautiful baby Girl in June, she is almost 6 months and the most beautiful little blessing, however I feel such overwhelming feelings of sadness and hopelessness sometimes and I feel completely confused and guilty for the way I am feeling, do I have PND? ):

A little about my back story. Before our baby girl arrived I suffered two miscarriages in a very short space of time. The first one we found out there was no heartbeat at a 14 week scan and I had to have a D&C to remove. The second one happened just a couple of months later and was a spontaneous miscarriage at around 9 weeks. I was absolutely heartbroken. About 4 months later we found out I was pregnant again but started spotting around 6 weeks so had to be taken to a early pregnancy clinic where they gave us the most incredible news that there was still a heartbeat and everything seemed perfect on the scan but they put me on progesterone pesseries as a precaution, cut a long story short the pregnancy was a very worrying and anxious time for me, that being said I enjoyed every moment of being pregnant I felt so incredibly grateful and blessed to be carrying this little baby and I loved every second of the pregnancy and carrying her (minus the anxiety I had which did get better later on) I was so excited and overjoyed and never thought I would feel this way. However since having her I have felt so sad, angry, upset, hopeless and I feel like I am struggling to cope. I am not going to lie i found the newborn stage incredibly difficult, in fact it completely knocked me off my feet as I was not expecting it to be as hard as it was.

She brings me so much happiness and joy and her face makes my heart burst, I am so proud of her but I also can not get over these negative feelings that I have, I cry a lot, I feel angry (not at her) but just at life and I feel such tremendous guilt because In reality i should be over the moon and happy, blessed and happier than I ever was? So why am I feeling this way? It has really knocked me and my confidence. It has made me feel like I am not a good mum, and that my little girl deserves better than me. My husband tells me all the time that I am an incredible mum and he is very supportive but I just can't get my head around these feelings and i really feel like I am struggling, I thought it would have gotten better by now but it hasn't. I feel too ashamed to ask for help by a Dr as I don't want to be put on medication and I don't feel my HV will really help, I don't want to feel judged or made to feel even worse than I do. I just feel like I am stuck and like I'm never going to feel better. I want to feel all the positive emotions and get so envious of others around me that seem to be smashing motherhood all while I am feeling like I'm struggling so much with it. I don't really know what I am asking for to be honest, I guess whether anyone has a similar story and did it get better? Or any advice

(sorry for the incredibly long post)

OP posts:
FoxFaceRabbitFish · 22/12/2024 23:47

I’m really sorry you feel this way OP. Your miscarriages must have been very traumatic and must have impacted on your pregnancy with your little girl. Then you’ve gone straight into new-parenthood which is very overwhelming. Do you feel you’ve had time to properly process your feeling about your miscarriages? I would really encourage you to seek some support from health professionals. Medication shouldn’t be the only option, talking therapy might be helpful for you. What you’re experiencing is something many women go through so I would hope any professional you talked to would be supportive and understanding and non-judgemental. Good luck!

Mark1990 · 02/01/2025 17:37

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