Down’s syndrome results

[Heartbrokensosad]

Hi I have just had results from an amniocentesis and it’s confirmed my baby has DS. I am so confused. I have 2 children already who are 4 and 9. I have recently split from the father and he would prefer if I terminate although he has said ultimately it’s my decision. I just don’t know what to do. I am 20 weeks with a boy. And I feel him move all the time. He looks fine on the the scan just smaller. But I am not sure I can look after a baby with downs and my 2 without it affecting them. I want the absolute best for my kids and this decision is breaking my heart. Advice please!

Nothing but a hand hold to offer.

Others with good advice will be along shortly but i would say information gathering is what you need to do. It might be worth seeing if any downs syndrome charities can put you in touch with parents/single mums of multiple children with youngest with downs

So sorry to hear that OP. No one can help you with that decision, I'm sure you know. People do try to be optimistic and look on the bright side, but you're the only one who knows if you're strong enough to take on the challenge. Have you got family to talk it over with and support you? Best wishes in whatever you decide to do.

I think the only advice is get counselling to talk through all your feelings. I don't know what I would do. I agree with what the other posters have said. Do you feel able to talk about it to a family member,

I'm sorry to read that you're going through this. I have recently been through the same.

Some sources of information that were helpful to me when I was trying to understand more:

• ARC (as others have mentioned above)

• Downs Syndrome Association (if you phone them they're very helpful answering questions)

• Positive About Downs Syndrome Facebook group

• @dontbesorry2 on instragram - a mum of a little boy who has Down's syndrome and she has documented his life. I also read her two books that she shows on the instagram page.

I found it helpful to just gather lots of information from various sources.

Best wishes however you decide to proceed from here. It's a decision no one should ever have to make.

Thank you all for your responses. My mind changes constantly. I do not know how to make this decision. I’ve no no idea how I can choose 😭😭

It's an absolutely awful decision to have to make. Also, no one truly knows what they would do until they're in this position.

Just take your time and I really recommend reaching out to some of the sources above.

Thinking of you x

I have a niece with Downs Syndrome who is a lovely young woman happily living with friends - her parents are wealthy and were able to send her to a private school that catered for her fairly mild difficulties and her independent living is well supported by them.

Whilst it's possible to see most cardiac abnormalities on pre-natal scans the degree of learning difficulty/disability, associated behaviour problems, ASD, etc etc are all unknown making the choice more difficult for you wrt to the impact on your existing children

ARC are excellent and hopefully will be helpful in making this awful decision

I have a daughter with Down's syndrome she's 2 years old, I can't begin to explain how lucky I got with this little girl, it changed our family but for the better, she brang us all closer, made us look at the world differently, appreciate everything more, she really is a big ray of sunshine, never a dull moment when she's around