Hi I just wanted to reply, I don't suffer from depression normally but I also had severe anxiety during my pregnancy. It was a bit different from yours but I was also anxious to leave the house, couldn't go anywhere without my partner. I remember still going to work and having to get off the bus halfway home because I was about to have a panic attack. The only thing that helped me was chewing gum as that gave me something else to focus on, or sipping water to calm myself when I felt like I was reaching a point and I used to try and still force myself to go out, however sometimes I still just couldn't and I didn't beat myself up about it. I know that's probably not very helpful to you but I guess I just tried to counteract the symptoms I was having. Could you try and find something similar? Have you had CBT?

Do you have a level of anxiety normally? The reason I ask is our DS had such bad anxiety it was affecting him at school and in life until a friend told me about a strong link beteeen the brain and gut health. For us it’s been extraordinary to see what good probiotics have done (combined With a low sugar diet and lots of healthy whole foods as prebiotics and diet are crucial to its success. I used to think he had autism and he is now completely unfazed by change or new things and extremely positive and unworried by anything. I just wanted to mention it just in case worth exploring as it’s horrible being anxious and must feel even bigger with not feeling ready to go out or see people

I had quite bad anxiety in my second pregnancy due to issues in my first. I was lucky enough to find a group therapy course which really helped me connect with th baby and pregnancy, although I still had bad days it gave me some time to be positive. It was such a lovely group! It was called Rockabye and may just be in Bristol. Good luck op you're nearly there.

It is good to offload and talk about it, and I’m reassured you’re on a good diet OP and do hope you get much better soon, it sounds like you are doing good things towards that and keep us posted . Social media is unhelpful sometimes and well done coming off it , remember it only shows a best view of someone’s life and I’m sure everyone has less than ideal bits too just like any of us

@CheeseBiscuitsChutney I feel EXACTLY the same. I almost marvel at anyone not feeling like this in pregnancy. I have completely ground to a halt too, and have really lost interest in anything. I'm going to speak to my midwife. Are you on any medication?

I was very anxious during my first pregnancy after a couple of early miscarriages. I didn’t buy very much baby stuff in preparation for the baby. I had a few clothes and not much else. I was told I was unorganised. But I just couldn’t bring myself to believe that my baby was going to be okay until the moment I laid my own eyes on them. He’s 19 years old now. I was far less anxious during my subsequent 2 pregnancies, I think just due to being busy with my other children. It’s very hard for people to understand unless they’ve experienced it, I think. I often wish that I’d been less anxious and really got into the swing of buying baby stuff etc. but the anxiety wouldn’t allow me to. I did feel a huge sense of relief when my first son was born and he was absolutely fine. I still worry about my children, that’s a natural thing with parenthood.

I suffered awful anxiety with my DD who is now 6!
Before her I sadly miscarried at 6 weeks, and at the same time my friend has miscarried later on in pregnancy so I couldn't help but feel my baby was going to die every single second of the pregnancy.
I broke down at every appointment, I remember lighting a candle next her scan picture crying begging her to survive.
I didn't announce it on social media because I couldn't bare the "so sorry" if I had to later announce the loss. I didn't buy anything, not one babygrow until was in the 30 weeks stage. I was so anal about any foods I ate, if I missed a vitamin tablet I'd have a panic attack. Everytime I went to the toilet I would prepare for blood. I was actually induced at 39+4 because I couldn't take the anxiety anymore and kept going in thinking I had reduced movements.

I delivered a beautiful, healthy little girl who like I say is 6 now. One thing I will say is I'm a firm believer in high cortisol levels during pregnancy transferring to the baby.. she didn't sleep, she screamed all the time LOL

I went on to have my 2nd DS who is now 3, I was soooo much more chilled I suppose because "I knew" my body could do it plus I had a near 3 year old to look after... and you know what, he was as chilled out as anything as a baby.

I wish you all the best, please remember you're not alone in your thoughts but you must try some relaxation techniques to try and get through it because the likelihood is everything will be fine 🙂 xx