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Antenatal/postnatal depression

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Antenatal depression - considering termination

3 replies

Mummyto3GBG · 25/10/2020 12:22

Hi all, I think I have antenatal depression...I’m not too sure. I recently found out I’m unexpectedly pregnant after having 3 sections. I was advised not to have a 4th but now I’m pregnant so don’t know what to do. Saw a consultant who said I wouldn’t be too high risk to continue but obviously risks increase the more sections you have. I have googled all the risks and although they are small risks (2-10% of this and that happening) to me they seem enormous risks to be taking. I always wanted 4 children and I hadn’t completely written off another child but I’d planned to speak to a consultant first in a couple of years (I probably wouldn’t of gone through with it after hearing the risks though) but now it’s happened unplanned much sooner than I wanted...i have that in one part of my mind that if I terminated I mightn’t forgive myself....then the other part of my mind I’m constantly worrying about what ifs....mainly what if I die, what if I leave my children motherless, what if there’s nobody to do my section if all the staff get Covid. I’m so tearful, I’ve been crying daily about this pregnancy and wishing for a miscarriage so I don’t have to make the decision myself. Ive lost half a stone in a week and I’ve rang up for a termination but I don’t know if I’d be able to go through with it but part of me thinks it would be best in the hope it’ll all come to an end and I can hopefully go back to the life as it was with my 3 children I have but I’m worried about the risks of a termination too. I’m worried about what people will say if I say I’m pregnant again. My partner was supportive of either decision (despite not wanting more kids) but as I’ve slowly become more anxious and withdrawn he’s starting to just get annoyed and thinks a termination is probably best. He’s doing everything in the house and looking after the kids, I feel really helpless. I’ve no one to talk to.

OP posts:
iwwntchocolate · 09/11/2020 00:20

Keep it

Doryhunky · 09/11/2020 00:25

You sound depressed and anxious and not like you want a termination

iwwntchocolate · 09/11/2020 00:37

You said you don't know if you'd be able to go through with it I was in your exact position 8 months ago except this is my first and I'm 20 I was so happy I found out I was pregnant then when I told my boyfriend he left me and tried to tell me to have an abortion it absolutely shattered me broke my heart he was being so mean to me he sent me into a deep depression
I was so lost and didn't know what to do I was considering abortion but knew deep down I wouldn't do it. When the pills by post got to my house I threw them away. I couldn't do it. I am now 36 weeks were back together and he's happy about our daughter and I can't believe what I was thinking! Ill never forgive him for how he made me feel but I'm so glad I stayed strong if your unsure about it having an abortion please please please don't that's something you have to live with for the rest of your life and once it's done there's no going back plus your depression will only get 100x deeper and worse if you end up doing it and regretting it

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