I cant leave the house.

[Chachababa99]

I have got a beautiful 7 month old baby boy. He and his dad have separated and have been on and off trying to make the relationship ship work. I moved out when we separated. Hes not a great sleeper so I am yo most if the night. When. It comes to the day time I am struggling to find things to do. With the weather being bad and no slot of money to go tot he shops for fear of spending too much i just cant see to get things together t leave the house i feel so guilty about this as i know he need to be out in he frah air. But I just cant seem to get it together u till about 5pm most days. I'll calm to my mums for an hour but that is the most I really do. People judge me and think I am lazy but i just dont j ow what's wrong with me i just cant seem to get the spring in my step that i used to have before. I go to a mum and baby group on a Tuesday morning when i cant get stuff ready in time. But because he is not sleeping at night i try to catch up as much as possible. I just dont know what to do. Any tips will help. Thank you

Keep your nappy bag in a state of constant readiness so you don't need to pack it. Get into a routine that you follow everyday and try to be dressed before his first nap. What worked for me was up, breakfast, plonk baby in bath seat and join them in there so you can wash, both out and dressing gown on, dress baby for the day, dress self for the day, playtime for baby in until a nap is needed, baby has a nap, when bby wakes, change nappy then straight out the door. You won't always manage it, but celebrate the small successes. The Hoop app will tell you what's on in your area and some activities are free. Sometimes it helps to have a deadline. Good luck and don't be so hard on yourself.

Oh, and cosleep if safe to do so-look at the safe co-sleeping guidance.

Go out one morning. The next day go out in the afternoon. Look at local places you can go such as park or even library and take him to read books in the library.

Even make a small picnic for you and DS and sit outside somewhere. You don't always have to go far

You seem knackered and like you don't get much time to yourself so it isn't any wonder you don't feel this way.

Sometimes what I do is, (aside from a baby group we go to) I'll go to shops for what I need and purposely leave out an item (not needed that day) so I can go back out the next day and get it. It sounds really stupid but then it means we're back out for another walk.

Look for local mum and baby groups (if that's your scene). Some places do activities for free. Can you get sometime to yourself??

Being organised and prepared for the next day will really help!

What really helped me what I learnt to motivate myself and I still do it now she's nearly 2 is to get Both of our clothes out the night before put them out ready for the morning.

When I'm in a depressive state something so small as not knowing what to wear can make me not leave the house and stay in pyjamas all day making me even more depressed!

Try and get out for a walk or something just do something small everyday
X

I sympathise because I couldn't go out for quite a long time after having a baby. He did get fresh air from being in the garden in pram but I really needed to go out, shutting myself indoors seemed odd to many others. Like you, I was terribly tired and didn't get things together until later in the day. On the odd occasion when I did manage to go out I couldn't wait to get back indoors and close the door. However that is all a long time ago, it didn't last forever and it was how I felt at the time.

I'm telling you this to show you that you are not alone. I've heard some others say that they were the same. It does no harm and things will change.

I'm so sorry about your other problems. You could do with some unobtrusive help, frankly.