Fed up, house is a complete mess, worried just need some comfort.

[Vi37]

Hi, just looking for some comfort really, Im 8 months pregnant, i have antenatal depression and anxiety. My house is a mess and I’m fed up, I’m getting help for my mental issues but im struggling with the house ever since getting pregnant. It just always looks a mess, there’s clothes on the floor, dog toys everywhere, most of the time there’s a pile of washing up in the sink, clothes drying over radiators and it’s getting me down, I work full time and have my own small business. We’re doing the spare room out for baby too so it’s also a mess upstairs. We had to rehome our two pet rats because I we didn’t have time to clean them so that upset me, I’m convinced that somehow a pair of socks on the floor or dust in the corner of the room is going to hurt my unborn baby. I don’t want or need advice on cleaning schedules, my mother in law has cleaning ocd and it’s like a show home which makes me feel even worse. My mums house is very clean too. No one ever comments and says it’s dirty but I just assume it is because Please tell me other people have houses like this and it’s not just me.

Do you have anyone such as DH who could help you blitz it? It's not all your job you know.x

He helps if I spell everything out for him. it just seems if you type in about keeping houses tidy on here and another forum I’m on to see if people are in the same boat, there are women who already have kids and Work and vacuum twice a day, dust, mop, clean the oven, change beds 14 times a week, polish lightbulbs and it makes me feel like a complete slob and worry that I’m somehow going to hurt my little man in my belly because of a pile of coats on the chair or some toast crumbs on the worktop.

My house is a perpetual mishmash of stuff. It’s not dirty, it’s just poorly organised. If it’s any help, when I was eight months pregnant, I got in cleaners to deep clean the kitchen and bathroom, and it was the best money I ever spent.

Anxiety and depression are hard things to live with, and being at home a lot can make you feel like you’re constantly battling mess. I think is worth making progress with - it will make you feel better, but don’t do it alone.

btw, so far my four month old hasn’t noticed the pile of clothes on the sofa... and his older brother definitely couldn’t care less. Don’t beat yourself up, and don’t let it contribute to your anxiety. It doesn’t need to.

Tiny tasks. Today, can you just make it your mission to put away the coats on the chair?
Tomorrow, think about the clothing on the radiators. You don't have to do that today. That's for tomorrow.

Tiny tiny steps.

Thank you everyone.