More angry than depressed..?

[Jojo13]

Hi,
I've had bouts of mild depression for a while, nothing really serious, but after having my first baby I was put on citalopram for pnd. I used to feel like I got angry so quickly, baby not sleeping, spilt milk etc.. I used to get so angry so quickly and then subsequently felt low because I felt like I wasn't coping etc.
I'm now almost 6 months with my second, I came off the citalopram when i knew I was pregnant but I'm just feeling so angry again?!
The dog barks and wakes baby and I fly off the handle in anger and feel like I hate my dog! Or my son is having a bad day (normal toddler stuff, whingey/clingy etc) and I feel like it takes hardly anything to get me absolutely seething. (And then subsequently upset at myself again for being such a cow)
Not sure if this is a sign of being down or whether I'm just a horrible person/have anger management issues.
I'm now starting to panic at how the hell im going to cope with a newborn feeling like this. I can't seem to just take anything in my stride. I just feel so short-tempered and awful.
Any thoughts? Thanks

Hi, I think you sound nothing like a horrible person with anger issues. And very normal as a pregnant mum of 1! I myself have had post natal depression with both my children 3 and 1 now and was diagnosed sertraline, though stopped taking them about 6 months back. I however quite often get angry like you at the smallest thing. I either lash out (not violently) at inanimate objects or cry uncontrollably in front of someone, even though they aren't to blame for anything.
The worst thing with depression is you feel all this anger, then feel incredibly guilty for feeling that way. I'm currently writing this as my husband is putting dd to bed after she cried so much I felt I couldn't cope and that I wish I had never been a mummy. Now she's quiet and being wonderful for daddy I hate that I could even think like that.
The good news is you can always speak to your dr, they can prescribe anti depressants for when you have your baby (and I mean as soon as baby make sure an appearance) should you want to. If not they can at least point you in the direction of someone you can talk to, so you can off load. Remember you have so many hormones going round so you are entitled to feel all over the place. A lot of the problem is stigma, we aren't supposed to feel angry are we? Us mums are supposed to be cool, calm and patient.
You are doing a great job, but do chat to your dr or midwife, you'll be surprised what support you will find. X

You sound like a hormonal pregnant woman who is doing her very best, to me. Definitely chat to your midwife and GP to keep them aware but I think it's very normal to be quick to anger, particularly when you have a toddler and are expecting. It's bloody hard work

Thank you both for taking the time to write. I hope you are feeling ok now Katie b.
I think before, I have only really ever felt "sad" with depression whereas now it is more anger and I suppose I don't really recognise it as a form of depression. If in fact it is. I will speak to midwife on next visit, thanks. Just makes me feel so impatient, snappy and miserable.! I don't want my son to grow up thinking I'm so angry (and I don't want my dog to hate me for shouting at him for barking! )

Hi,

I am currently 17 weeks with my first and I am struggling with the same thing.....I'm just so angry and break down crying uncontrollably over really petty stuff.
It's really hard on my partner...and my dog also
It does make me feel better that it's not just me and it must be pregnancy related!
I think I will need to visit the doctor or midwife as it's really not a health environment for me, my relationship or my unborn baby.
Hope you start to feel better soon and keep me posted if you find anything that makes you feel better!!