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Antenatal/postnatal depression

Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.

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Original poster

antenatal depression or hormones?

13 replies

Becky5W · 13/05/2016 08:21

Hi. I've just found out that I'm pregnant with my 2nd child. We did try and we did want another baby. My lg is just turning 3. It's all happened very fast, we started to try on 26th April and I fell pretty much straight away. I'm only 4 weeks so very early. We were both so excited when the test was positive. However, I'm now very unsure about the whole thing. I feel like I don't want it, but I know if anything was to happen then I would be devastated. I worry about everything and had PND with my lg. Is this type of antenatal depression or is it just my hormones? Everything I think about being pregnant, I feel sick and start crying. How can I feel like this when it was all I wanted? I feel so terrible when I should be feeing so grateful and happy. Has anyone else been through this? Thanks

OP posts:

Original poster

Becky5W · 13/05/2016 08:25

Forgot to mention that my feelings have only changed in a matter of days. I found out 10th may and that day was the best day! And now I feel like this?

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whiteychappers · 17/05/2016 14:45

Id say its a combination of hormones and the reality kicking in. I've just got to 21 weeks and have been feeling a bit rough. I think when you've had a past history of some kind of mental health issue I never truly goes away. It doesn't mean you aren't happy to be having a baby. For me I've had a rough first trimester and the second trimester hasn't really been much better so I'm not enjoying pregnancy. I'm going to give it a few weeks and if I'm feeling the same I will go to the GP as it might be more than just hormones x

Original poster

Becky5W · 17/05/2016 21:32

Thank you for replying. It's so difficult isn't it? I hope you are okay. Sending good thoughts x

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whiteychappers · 18/05/2016 10:07

My hubby has helped me loads this week by making me write down all the things in worried about and then he has gone through the list and put my mind at rest. The last couple of days I have been a bit tearful still but I know its just thoughts. I know I love my baby boy, its just when I'm feeling sick and tired, I think I cant cope with the feelings. Is there anything in particular you are worrying about?

Original poster

Becky5W · 18/05/2016 19:10

Aw that's good. I already have a 3 year old so don't know if it's because I know what to expect lol or if it's because I know its going to be so much harder with 2. X

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whiteychappers · 18/05/2016 19:34

Its probably because it all happened a bit quicker than you were ready for. Mines kind of the opposite, we tried for years and had given up. Part of me is scared in case it goes wrong as its taken us so long to get here, I guess I'm protecting myself. I'm sure it will be hard with two but it cant be that bad if other people do it. That's what I keep telling myself that the population would have died out if it was all bad. I think I feel a bit like I should be enjoying every moment and feel like a bad mother as I'm not feeling that way. Its just such a weird experience not like I guess I had imagined, it didn't cross my mind it would be hard work and so tiring 😊 my hubby keeps reminding me when I think of bad scenarios that have I ever thought of the good scenario that everything will be ok and we will live happy ever after. I guess we just learn to cope x

Original poster

Becky5W · 19/05/2016 21:47

I like your hubby's way of thinking! Definitely think it's because of how quickly it's happened. But I know that's a good thing. I'm glad things worked out for you, everything happens for a reason. X

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Belle81 · 07/02/2018 13:41

Hi, I know this is an old post but just wondered if it passed for you naturally or if you got some medical help? I feel exactly the same, the thought of it all makes me feel physically sick and I don't want to feel like this for the rest of the pregnancy, I'm only 7 weeks! Thank you x

Lilyjac · 07/02/2018 16:42

Belle81 I’ve been feeling the same, I posted the other night about having doubts even though it’s planned and it seems from others experience it’s just hormones! I constantly feel like crying though, I’m 14 weeks and don’t feel excited at all. Part of me doesn’t want there to be a heartbeat at my scan how awful does that make me?!?! I planned this baby. I wanted it so bad. I don’t even think I want my partner anymore most of all I’m scared these feelings won’t go away! Is this just hormones or depression to be concerned about?!

Belle81 · 07/02/2018 19:14

I am sure it is hormones but that doesn't help when you can't see and end in sight. Have you spoken to your midwife or GP? I'm seeing my midwife this week and am hoping she can offer some advice. Don't beat yourself up about how you're feeling, you can't control it, but you can get help to manage it. Just try to remember that you won't always feel like this. I hope this stage soon passes so we can start enjoying our pregnancies x

Lilyjac · 08/02/2018 06:36

Oh let us know what she says! Not yet i’ll Wait until my next appointment. I mentioned I was low at my last one but wasn’t sure if it was due to how ill I was, so it’s all there in my notes :)
Hope so too! Good luck x

LittleLoveXoxo · 04/06/2018 15:13

oh i feel the same, i struggle with an eating disorder, anxiety and depression, but on/off not 24/7. When we found out i was sooo happy for a couple weeks, but lately its like i have to remind myself to be excited? But i think its a combination of everything for me. Its my first child, and we havent sorted out permanent accommodation yet. Usually when i feel low about stresses in my life i use my bulimia as a comfort, binge eating, throwing up and exercising is such a comfort for me - and i can't do it anymore! i used to smoke and drink most weekends also, so all this worry and stress combined with all of my methods of relaxation and stress relief being taken away has really taken a toll!

I think its completely natural to worry, youre about to bring a whole new life into the world, you wouldnt be a good mother if you didnt worry to some extent. Please try to remind yourself to be excited, you've already had a baby so you must remember the feeling of bringing them home, all their first milestones - just think about how you get to experience that all over again :) good luck and remember do not bottle it up xx

Queenmj · 10/07/2018 08:26

I had my DD three weeks ago and have a 2 year old DD who has just hit the terrible two stage. I had been feeling fine until yesterday, when I had a major rush of anxiety. I haven't slept in 2 days (1hour a night) and I'm starting to panic that I'm getting pd. Looking for some advice please, as I feel am alone. I also had a tramatic birth, I went into natural labour but the ward was busy and got left in the waiting area, by the time I was seen I was 9cm but I was due a cs as my baby was breach, so I just made it down to theatre in time and when my DD was born she was taken to ICU due to breathing problems. She is good now tho.

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