My pnd started quite early on. Maybe after a week or so. Everyone told me it was the baby blues. However it never got better and continued to get worse over the course of weeks/months.
How old is your baby?
I completed the tests the hv's do but lied as I didnt want to feel like a failure.
I was anxious, low and felt zero bond with dd. I resented her for messing up my easy pre baby life. Resented her as she wouldn't breast feed properly and had colic and reflux so cried practically all the time. I was severely sleep deprived which made matters 10 times worse.
At 5-6 months in I still felt no bond and just wanted to run away. It was then that I knew I needed to seek medical help. I went to the gp who said I had severe pnd and gave me tablets. I took them but they didn't work for me.
The only thing that worked was time and lots and lots of emotional support from my lovely mum! She got me through it. I was over the worst when dd was 12 months old.
She's 22 months now and I absolutely bloody adore her. The love I feel for her I cannot describe. Being a mum is hard, the hardest thing I've ever done. However as they grow and develop a little personality they are great company. In the early days they give nothing back and it's all sleepless nights and lots of hard work.
How are you feeling? What do you feel that makes you wonder if you have pnd?
Hang on in there, pnd does pass and there's lots of help and support out there. There will be groups in your local area where you can attend with other mums who are currently going through the same things. Also mums that have been through it to help and offer support and advice.
Speak to those who understand you and seek support don't suffer in silence as it'll make it harder for you.