Scared i may be depressed

[TailFeathers]

I can't really tell whether this is the hormones or if I'm getting a bit depressed. I don't know really if this is the right place to say it, but thought I would try in case anyone else has had anything similar.

I'm crying a lot, and I'm feeling really disgusted by pregnancy and the thought of having a baby - breastfeeding in particular horrifies me, and the fact that my boobs have already swelled up 3 sizes to H cups. They look dreadful, and feel horrible, and I can't sleep because every movement of the sheet against them wakes me up.

I feel like I'm going mad. Everyone keeps telling me stories about how awful childbirth and babies are. And I've started to believe them, and I feel dreadful about it. And I can't tell DH because he's still excited about the baby and all I can think is, it's awful now, and it's only going to get worse.

Sorry. This is a bit longer than I meant. Is this something I should talk to my GP about? I have midwife appointments at the hospital so I don't have a personal relationship with any of them, and they're always too busy to talk, just give me whatever leaflet I'm meant to have that session and then send me away.

Hi TailFeathers, I would say to contact your GP to discuss. Depression in pregnancy is under reported and it is important to get the support you need. It is not unusual to feel the way you do. I know I did. I did not get the help I needed and looking back getting that help may have helped me. I was not a happy pregnant mother. I know it is hard but discussing it with your partner is also very important. Sometimes it is the reassurance that you need as the focus is on the baby coming and not always the well being of the mother. It may also help to put things in perspective.

What you wrote above is all you need to say to your GP. There is also an organization call 'time to talk' which is an NHS initiative and you can call and they can help or direct. You don't say how far along you are, but going to a class may help such as NCT but there are others. This may also ease your fears.

Pregnancy, birth and child rearing are not always easy but they are not life ending. Just life changing...
Good luck.