Hi there :-) I've never posted before but I thought it may help to hear some other people's opinions....

I've recently found out I'm pregnant with my second baby (planned and am delighted!!) But it has dredged up so many negative feelings about my first birth experience (episiotimy, ventouse delivery).

I really experienced the cascade of intervention first hand!! It was always our intention to have a water birth at a midwifery led unit but due to (boarderline) low amniotic fluid levels and some conflicting advice from consultants (some asked why I was worried at all and everything was fine!! I'd like to add that I wasn't at all worried it was other consultants that referred me! Other consultants wanted to induce me!!) Anyway we ended up in a birthing suite in our hospital.

Long story short, I was laboring beautifully in a small dark private room just me and my husband. But as the labour progressed the midwives needed to transfer me to the labour suite (massive bright and white like a surgical theatre). My waters broke as I stood up to get into the wheelchair to travel to the suite, I was told that I was unable to take the gas and air with me during the transfer (it was totally transportable) and I felt like I completely lost control and focus by the time I reaches the suite.

At this point I was told that I was only 5cm dilated and couldn't stand the thought of 5 more hours of these contractions and requested pethedin (something I vowed never to do).

Before the pethedin had kicked in my entire body needed to push, I had no control over it, my body was taking over and my sons head could be seen!!

However then the pethedin kicked in and my baby went back up inside and the urge to push evaporated. My son was born (completely healthy) an hour later via a large episiotimy and venouse. I felt like he was ripped out of me!

For many months after the birth I cried about it and now all these emotions are coming back and I find myself crying again... I was so positive about the birth the first time around.

I have just had my first midwife appointment today and she is already referring me to consultant led :-( I fear the cascade of intervention has already begun at 5 and half weeks and feel helpless :-(