Feeling unsure about whether to take meds or not PND -Help!!!!

[peanutbuttery24]

Hello all,

I've been diagnosed by my GP as having pnd, based on feelings of anxiety and just not enjoying being a new, first time mum as much as I feel I should. However, I'm functioning ok - getting up, washed, dressed etc, meeting people. I am exhausted and exclusively breastfeeding - even when I'm not waking to feed in the night I wake up with the noises my lo makes. I feel tense most of the time and have been putting myself under huge amounts of pressure to get things 'right' and encourage my 7 week old into a gentle routine (not using any controlled crying just lots of love and sleep cues). I love my lo but don't yet feel fully bonded - we had a difficult birth. I feel quite trapped and mourn my old life and relationship with my husband.

People tell me it'll get better but I feel like that's all I'm hanging on to, and what exactly will get better?? Lo may settle a little more but overall is a pretty good baby, with the usual fussiness you'd expect. So it's more when will I feel better?

Very nervous about taking sertraline due to side effects and feeling of committing to a path I'm not sure I should be on. I took my first pill last night before bed (advised by gp due to breastfeeding) and felt I was wired, hardly got any deep sleep and struggled to get back off to sleep after feeding - that is not what I've been used to! As I was sleeping lightly I struggled to block out lo sleepy noises so it was not a restful night. I've also woken feeling nauseous and still quite wired, even like the anxiety is worse. I'm now nervous that on top of everything I'm going to get no rest at all - but worried if I don't take the meds nothing will get better.

Please help! In my past life I was an energetic go-getter with loads of energy, love and joy. I feel like everything has changed and not sure who I am anymore. We had an awful week last week with other stresses and I think I was doing ok upto that point - so part of me wonders whether I do have pnd or just had a bad week. I'm now WORRYING about whether I have pnd too. :(

TIA xxx

I cannot offer any advice, only tell you my experience. I was diagnosed with mild PND when DD was 6 months old and experienced many of the same feelings as you. It didn't help that I lost my job while on maternity leave, and my DS became sick. I felt very trapped and isolated and mourned the freedom I had before children. I also had a huge amount of guilt about feeling this way - many people would love to gave my life, do why am I so unhappy?

I decided not to use pills but to gave councilling instead. I've been going for a few months now and it's been great and I am feeling much better. I understand myself a lot more now, and am much kinder to myself as a result. The dark days are now fewer in number and don't seem quite so dark!

Whatever you decide to do, I hope you feel better soon!

Thank you for responding! I feel like I'm going a little mad and questioning whether I'm just a normal new mum, or whether I do have pnd and need the meds. I've always believed if you can fix something yourself that's better than medication. I really don't feel myself today and wondering if the side effects will get better.

It's scary feeling like this when you know there isn't an end in sight right now .

Glad you found something that worked for you and you're feeling better all the time xx

How are you getting in today? I forgot to say yesterday try to be kind to yourself. Having a baby turns your life upside down and it takes some getting used to! Your lo is only seven weeks and his/her needs are very basic so don't worry about doing everything right, you will both find your way together over time.

I felt much like you after my second. Honestly, the sertraline saved my marriage and my sanity. That "wired" feeling settled in a week or so and the nausea settled within a month (by which time I'd lost about 10lb as a bonus ). I found (still do find) ear plugs really helpful. Means I don't hear little baby grumbles, but still hear him when he really needed me. Get good foam ones, they're pennies.

I took the sertraline for about 6 months, then weaned myself off as was ttc. I could have done with staying on them another 6 months tbh.

The early days are so hard. It does get easier eventually, but when that happens is so variable. With my first "better" was at 8 weeks, with my second at 7 months, and I have friends who have real problems with their NT children's eating and or sleeping at aged 4+. So I think waiting for something to just magically change might be short changing yourself. Good luck.

Hi there, I was on sertaline many years ago for anxiety and the first few days if taking them I felt a lot worse then a few days after I started to feel so much better. Things can creep up on you before you know it and it doesn't mean you will be on meds forever, I wS on it for a year then weaned myself off. Haven't needed to go back on them since but now with a 9 month old a few signs are creeping back so I may have to go back on them but you'll be fine. Your a great mum doing a great job and seven weeks is still so young, it does get easier x

Hi, this is my first post. Looking for some advice. I had my lb 5 1/2 weeks ago. I have had extreme anxiety and disturbed sleep (insomnia) from the moment I gave birth. I have been on sertraline for 9 days now but haven't noticed any improvement. I'm very scared that I'm never going to feel normal again, how do people cope with this condition?

Hi 123x, I hope you're feeling better. I don't know much/anything about sertraline but thought I would reply to try and bump the thread for you.

The best advice I was given for coping was from my councillor who said I don't need to fight my feelings but just accept that I feel them. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad/anxious. It was the fighting my feelings that made me so tired, anxious and overwhelmed and once I stopped life didn't feel such a struggle.

I was in exact same situation as you three years ago. Very reluctant to take ADs due to fear of effect on baby through BFing etc. COuldn't really see how anything would "improve" etc. You have to make your own choice, but in the end I took the ADs after nearly 3 months of on/off misery and after a week of them settling in (like you, feeling wired, couldn't sleep, then zombie-like, sick etc) everything did get a lot better. My baby was exactly the same, but my perception of everything had changed. I really empathise with the not-wanting-to-take-the pills feeling, and I'm not saying you should if you don't want to, but you shouldn't think that it's the worst thing in the world. Put it this way, if you break your leg you would accept painkillers for it. Your body is still doing the healing itself, but the painkillers make your job a lot easier! (ANd I say this as someone who went for the full-on natural birth over days and days of agony with no pain relief in case it hurt my baby!). Good luck. It WILL get better, I promise.

P.s. 123x - the side effects and how long they last vary from person to person, and also by the dose you're taking. I found mine settled quite quickly but realistically you need to psych yourself up for about three weeks of feeling odd. I know that sounds like a lot but you're already part way there. Hold on.