need him gone

[readytokill]

Hi

I at first thought that I just had depression but as time has gone on I have realised that it is more than just that. My partner is not supportive, he doesn't care about my comfort. Worst part is he seems like such a nice guy to everyone else so I can't confide in anybody.

He has accused me of not trying because I refuse to have sex ( I am 39 weeks 4 days), my back is constantly painful and I have very loose ligaments on my pubic bone (it hurts to just sit up) and he thinks I was faking a thrush infection (not sure how anyone can do that). He doesn't clean up so I am left with all the domestic chores and the cooking and he spends his time complaining about having to do dishes. He deliberately passes gas in my presence when I have asked him time and time again not to (may not seem that bad but once every 10 or so minutes is allot and I was raised in such a way that this kind of behavior is considered disrespectful)

I am already depressed but truth is I am tired of being with someone who doesn't value or respect me. My family is far far away and I have noone here where I stay.

My question is, is it easier to ask him to leave before the baby is born or should I wait till I am stronger and can get back to work? Which would you advise ?

[Katiejon]

Have u discussed this with your midwife?

[moomoomama109]

Hi, I feel for you, your head must be all over the place. The answer can only come from you but I will say that nothing is easier once the baby is born and things that mattered before like wanting a relationship to be based on teamwork, fairness and mutual support matter 1,000 times more once you have a little person to care for and who takes up 99% of your time. Also, there will be no room then for your partner to be the child anymore and it will be a test of his character whether he grows up or not. I have a 15 month old and to be honest, it's only about now that my head feels clear again (but I do l appreciate that everyone's different). I think it's important for you to talk to your health visitor (they are lovely and are used to all this) and make sure you meet some other mums at groups as you must not carry all this on your own. Try and remember that whatever happens you will soon have a beautiful little son or daughter - wishing you happier, calmer times x