PND developing after 10 months or just the effect of prolonged sleep deprivation?

[Brugmansia]

DS is almost 11 months. He's always been a bad sleeper and other than the odd few days has woken at least every 2/3 hours. Added to that I frequently then am unable to get back to sleep and am still awake the next time he wakes. He barely naps during the day either so I have never been able to catch up then. Unsurprisingly I am now absolutely shattered.

Over the past month or so the way I am feeling seems to have shifted. I'm crying regularly and it is often triggered by trivial things or just comes upon me out of nowhere. I am constantly on edge and snap at completely minor things, either getting very angry at DP or breaking down into tears. Last week when out christmas shopping I became very anxious and had a panic attack, which I've never experienced before.

The past week or so have suddenly got worse, partly because I am having problems with my work, which I am due to return to in a month. Part of how I am feeling is about that, eg. frustration at how they are acting and feeling that things are out of my control. The effect on how I feel though seems disproportionate and I've started having very negative thoughts about my life as a whole, feeling very trapped and that I am a weak and incompetent person. The only good thing is DS.

Even though I've been very tired all the time since DS was born I've been coping and mainly happy. I now feel overwhelmed. Could this be PND, so late after DS was born. Or is it just a the accumulated effect of being so sleep deprived coupled with the anxiety of returning to work? I'm not sure what to do? Should I go to my GP?

I think you need a long sit down in a big comfy chair with a glass of red. We can dream :) I think you're under lots of stress right now and lack of sleep defo doesn't help with work worries thrown on top. A visit to the docs will do no harm

It sort of doesn't matter whether it's PND or 'just' sleep deprivation - the result is the same (ie you feeling tearful and anxious). I felt the same as you when DS was six months old, and was in a similar situation with sleep and anxiety over going back to work.

I saw my GP and did the depression questionnaire thingy, which showed I was suffering from 'moderate depression'. They referred me v promptly to a counsellor for CBT, which helped massively. Luckily I also landed another job at the end of mat leave which lessened my anxiety about work (my old employers were being a pain in the arse). I never really worked out whether it was 'proper' PND or not, but like I said, it sort of didn't matter.

Go to the doc - it can't hurt. Hope you feel better soon - I know exactly how you feel, and it's awful