help

[crazypaving]

I'm not coping. ds2 is 17wks, and after over a year of pnd with ds1 I thought I'd got away with it. but in the last week or two it's like a switch has flipped - I can't cope, can barely hold it together and just want to escape. I just want to lie down and shut my eyes and be left alone.

I need somehow to break this pattern of negativity. please, can anyone help? I really want to avoid taking antidepressants.

Hurrah, glad you're feeling a bit more positive! Have you made an appointment to see your GP yet?

no I haven't. keep telling myself I'll wait to see what happens first. I'm just worried they'll try to push me to take ad's and won't have anything else helpful to say. I'm not really sure what they can do - I wouldn't be able to make it to counselling because I couldn't get childcare.

OK. Well, your GP can't force you to do/take anything you don't want to. That's up to you. Do you have a nice GP?

That is a problem about childcare. Is there no one who could take the DCs for an hour while you went?

Hope you're feeling ok today.

My HV said she was going to refer me to a PND group at the Children's Centre which has a crèche. Might be worth speaking to yours to see if they offer anything similar?

I don't know what my reticence is with talking to hcp's about this. saw the hv today and downplayed it, but then I am feeling brighter atm. I think I don't feel comfortable talking about this kind of thing with people I know and trust, let alone perfect strangers. probably sounds like a terrible excuse but hv's generally do my head in and I find GPs a bit abrupt and rushed.

I've spoken to dh about it and we're going to see how things go. I'm more aware now, having had pnd with ds1, and now having had this episode. I don't want pnd to ruin my mat leave this time round, but I think sleep has a lot to do with my mood and it's been so crap recently that could be why. sleep's been a bit better the past two nights and my mood's improved accordingly.

I don't want to feel like I've wasted your time and I really appreciate all your support - I was really panicking a couple of days ago and felt really alone, and your responses made me feel less alone. if I have another big dip in mood I will talk to my GP and see what they can do.

long rambly post...thank you for sticking with me!

You haven't wasted our time, don't be daft. Really glad you're feeling a bit better. Lack of sleep is utterly awful, it's easy to feel low when you're utterly knackered. Look at it this way though: the hard part is over, sleep wise, your DS should start sleeping longer and longer with every passing week. That's the plan anyway!

Take care OP. Post back if you need support x

I don't feel like my time has been wasted, don't worry. Glad you're feeling better & we'll still be here if you ever need a chat

thank you! I will!