When I had PND, I hardly cried, I was just really angry about things like the mess in the house that I felt everyone was making but not helping to clear up! The baby's crying went right through me and she wouldn't be put down so to avoid the crying I held her all the time. Then I couldn't do anything in the house and so it got worse! I used to explode at everyone and then storm out and go for a drive for half an hour. Must have scared everyone to death as they didn't know when or if I would go back. Was just awful.
Really feel for you. I took ads which did work. Don't know if I would still be here without them. They do take a while to kick in, but the sooner you take them, the sooner you'll feel better. I know there are ones you take while breastfeeding. Groups and counselling not at all compulsory. In fact, very hard to access even if you did want them. There were no groups where I live.
Netmums have quite a lot of useful information and tips to help. Your Health Visitor should be able to offer support but they seem to vary in how good they are. Definitely worth approaching though. I had a great one for a while but then she left.
I can't advise about telling your family. It depends if they will help and support you or not. I needed someone to take the baby off me for a bit but that wasn't possible in my case, sadly.
I also was very bonded to my baby and loved her very much. I had an 8 year old too.
My advice is to make sure your DH reads about PND and understands it's a biochemical reaction to birth and not something that can be controlled by the sufferer. I hope you feel better soon. Happy to chat more on here if you want.
I don't think the blood pressure would be linked but would definitely ask the doc when you see them. I'm guessing that would be a separate issue, but not a medical peep!