*Trigger warning - sexual abuse* To feel really weird about what my boss said?

My take exactly but I met a girl like that so I'm biased.

That feeling in the pit of your stomach is literally revulsion, because her opinions are revolting.

She has created an offensive environment which is unacceptable.

I think she is indirectly and perhaps unconsciously using this story to reveal something very personal about herself to you. Whether it is that she has been abused or experienced incest or not I can't say, but something very sexually wounding has clearly happened to her and in her mind 'young girls' have been scapegoated for it (maybe someone left her for a younger girl?) In revealing this wound she is crossing a professional boundary, and worse, the indirect means of the disclosure leaves you in the uncomfortable position of having to imagine what the nature of the offense might be, and inevitably fearing the worst interpretation, that she is actually letting you know she is an active paedophile. It is difficult either to forget this and brush over it, or to address it, so you are caught in a tricky position if you want to continue to have a human relationship with her. I think I would wait for the right moment to raise my own/a friend's story of how hurtful abuse is for a vulnerable child, how all children deserve to be protected and stood up for, and see what that opens up. As in, use the same indirect approach to speak directly to the wounded part of her and let her know you know she didn't deserve it. But a very tricky one

YANBU, this is disgusting. I would be deeply disturbed by this. She should've reported this stuff to the police. I would find a new job, I wouldn't be able to work with someone after that, let alone be managed by them.

She says there's no one higher though, which I take to mean it's a small business, with this woman as an owner manager?

I'm not disagreeing with you that it's not something you'd normally report, it just sounds in this instance that there's no one to report it to?

But yes I would definitely have a problem with working alongside someone who'd made these comments and would be looking to leave.

Hope it doesn't sound like I'm excusing or minimising what's she's said, because it's absolutely vile. Really fucking vile.

God she’s a fucking weirdo and I haven’t really got anything else to say on the matter. I would be looking for another job as i could not work for a peadophile sympathiser.

Agree with PP I think this is deeply disturbing. discussing this sort of thing in the workplace is so very inappropriate.

I think there are two ways to go with this.

Firstly you could try and explain to her about abuse and say what she has said is wrong etc.

Or you could go grey rock- just stick to work talk and don’t talk about personal issues at all.

You could also opt to actively stop her talking if she ever mentions anything like this again “I don’t think we should discuss this in work”.

Up to you.

It's incredibly disturbing. Thank goodness she doesn't have any children.

Is she is the owner of the business? If she isn't, I think you should speak to someone higher up in confidence. If she is, I would be looking for a new job.

Yuck. No advice but you have my sympathy. I had a similar conversation with a co worker at a previous job. Although in this case the young girl discussed was a friend of her daughter and abused by a local school bus driver, not her father. It actually made me feel ill and I lost all respect for my co worker. It just leaves you with such an unpleasant feeling that a grown adult can somehow scape goat a vulnerable kid like that.