To think this is inappropriate homework for an 11 year old? **MNHQ adding content warning for CSA**

When you read the collection of short stories in it's entirety with a grown adult's mind, it's actually very interesting and well written.

The ways that the children and abusers both justify the situation and tell themselves "it's not that bad", "they probably won't even remember" when we, the reader, know different is very hard to read but sadly quite common amongst survivors and perpetrators. It's important to understand these mindsets so they can be challenged and the truth of the impact acknowledged.

Then the story has a somewhat positive ending where you learn that at least 2 of the perpetrators have been brought to justice, though of course we can never know the true impact. But it does give it an element of closure which the first extract does not have, it ends with a feeling of dread.

As a short, individual piece it is completely inappropriate for school. Perhaps as a full piece it could be OK for older students.

@TheGrimSqueakersFlea "We read similar in school at that age. Grooming happens and children need to learn the warning signs

Interesting. Can you remember the texts you studied?.

I've tried to re-report the thread and it won't let me @HopeMumsnet

To be honest I don't think that has a place in school at any age. Especially as unfortunately this may have happened to a student and I don't like this word particularly as its used so much, but 'Triggering'.

I think @Quz makes a good point though? It's written so well it could read either as very innocent or very sinister depending on the innocence of the reader. If an 8 yr old understood the meaning then wouldn't that be a red flag? I'd be interested to know at what age a normal (ie not abused) child would understand the subtext.

Jeez. Lucky it went over the kids head. Maybe from year 10 up that would be appropriate but definitely not for a year 7 pupil.

Far too much for an 11 year old and the sexual content will go above the heads of most of them, unless perhaps they are in the same situation.
I think the only explanation is teh reacher hadnt actually read it themselves

Often on MN you see 'is this inappropriate' and it's usually 6 of one, half a dozen of the other.

But this is categorically unacceptable for an 11 year old. My DC is nearly that age and I cannot think how awful that kind of homework would be for them. And also Y7+ homework broadly speaking is usually done without an adult (apart from your club) and so the student would have no one to talk to about this. Utterly unacceptable.

@CurlewKate No, it was the early 90s so quite a long time ago. The area I grew up in had a lot of problems, we were taught about abuse, drugs and alcohol from 11/12 because most of us had already been exposed to them.

The greatest % (some estimates as high as 70%) of children who are sexually abused will have been sexually abused before they are 12 years old. If the point is to teach them what to look out for so that it doesn't happen to them, by the time they are 11 you are too late.

It seems as though a lot of folks here think that children shouldn't be taught about childhood sexual abuse. How are they going to protect themselves from being abused if they don't realize that what someone (usually someone they love; more likely the younger they are) is asking them to do is wrong? They don't have to be given the gory details, but if they are old enough to start asking where babies come from, they are old enough to start hearing about the difference between adults physically expressing love with each other, and adults expressing "love" with children.

To answer the question that @LaMaG pondered...The way this is written, it would only be recognized for what it is by a child who had experienced something similar (no matter their age), or a child that had been taught that this is one of the tactics that adults use to encourage sexual behavior in children.

So why set it as homework? Home is often where the abusers live.

JFC people. This is not how we teach about abuse. This is not how schools should be 'screening' for abused children, whatever thats supposed to mean.

@ProwlingD the thread is 7 pages long, are you planning to come back at all?

Have you discussed this with the parents, OP?

Glad you've spoken to the parents OP

What happens in the end?

When my son was 7 he brought home a reading scheme book about a girl being bullied for being a witch.

I was horrified. Then I thought about it. That would never happen to my son and I’d really have rathered he didn’t read about it. However he didn’t seem to be impacted.

How would that book play to:
a) a girl being bullied for being a witch. On the end the bullies were shamed and it stopped. A story of hope telling the girl this is not ok and she should speak to someone.
b) a child bullying another for being a witch. Again this tells the child it is not ok and he should stop.

Both good things.

We underestimate how children perceive totally wrong behaviour as normal simply because it is normal in their experience and in their circles.

I don’t know the stats on abuse like this. There may be many children reading it and realising for the first time that they are not alone and it’s not ok to be treated this way.

As OP said, the eleven year old who is not being abused didn’t get it and wasn’t disturbed.

A child’s summary of this book may be the first sign to anyone that the child is being abused.

This.

I’m sorry you suffered @Strawberrydelight78

You are right that this book may help a child who is suffering.