To think kids' parties are a joke

They will literally dismantle a balloon arch I wouldn't bother and the last party I was at had two Colin the caterpillars as the cake and every bit was eaten.
To be honest I'd spend the money on soft play instead and save your house.and you won't need drink for adults.

You don't need to do either of these things. We bought a plain iced cake from M&S for £20 and decorated it, including some handmade icing figures we got from Etsy - cost £35 total.

Why do you need a balloon arch? 5 year olds don't care about stuff like that. We just blow up balloons, stick them the house around and make decorations out of crepe paper.

Balloon arches... no one had even heard of them until a couple of years ago!! Completely unnecessary, not to mention bad for environment

Cake... bespoke cakes are expensive. Ingredients, time, utilities etc. You can make your own or buy an off the shelf one a lot cheaper. Or just but a topper.

Buy two supermarket cakes, one to carry out with candles and a second to make sure there’s enough for 20+ family, and buy a balloon arch kit from Amazon, then go down to Morrisons that morning for a couple of stand alone helium ones. That’s £265 down to about £60 tops, and the kids won’t notice the difference.

Forget the balloon arch, seriously. Have a couple of individual helium balloons if you like.

Who are you inviting, classmates or family? How many? What do you mean drink for adults, alcohol? (I do admit that a bottle of wine ready for the evening wind down is nearly essential! 😆)

Why are you paying for the presents? The guests usually bring one each.
Why/what are the adults drinking?
Who needs a balloon arch for anything?

Parties can be as cheap or expensive as you want them to be, but they don't need to include everything.

My DD is turning 5 and we are paying £172 for 10 children to hire a party room for 2 hours at a local farm fun park with soft play. You get the room for 2 hours, all food and decorations included. Entry for all children and 1 adult each included for the whole day. All I need to do is the cake.
Depends how many children you are planning to invite as it would be very expensive for a whole class party.
I could not afford £500 and its very minimal hassle for me which is key as I have a newborn baby and DH will be working away! I agree the cost of all these things are crazy.

I think it would be cheaper to have it at a softplay/trampoline park/laser zone type place.

DS1s party is less than £300 for half his class including food and party bags. I always buy a supermarket superhero/dinosaur cake for class parties as they have a big sticker saying "no nuts"

You are the one buying in to the bullshit, no one is forcing you to do any of that stuff. Bake a bake, chuck up some bunting and give them all balloons to play with.

There’s nothing wrong with a Collin the Catapillar, and a bouncy castle in a village hall. You could probably do it for less than £100.

All that stuff is expensive but you don’t need any of it.

I don’t know how anyone could make a cake for cheaper tbh.

Cake from ASDA and blow up some balloons yourself. Everything is expensive if you choose expensive things.

Well you don’t need a balloon arch or a £75 cake either if you can’t afford it.
Balloon arches are actually really quite easy to put together yourself. You can buy kits and if you get an electric pump it’ll still
have only cost you about £50.
If spend your money more wisely if I was you.

You can get balloon arch kits on Etsy, they get good reviews and are much cheaper. No way would I spend that!

This is true.

You are choosing balloon arches, incredibly expensive cakes and whatever else is "current" It really doesnt have to be so expensive.

Your child won’t be any less impressed with a pile of balloon and a supermarket cake.

If you have/ or know someone with a Costso membership you could consider one of their cakes. They look good and taste amazing, are huge and only £16.50!

Dont worry about the balloon arch! We did a party yesterday and all the balloons were ripped down to play with.

Is this party for your DC or for your Instagram Page?

Balloon arches are beyond tacky.

I can recommend Colin the Caterpillar for a birthday cake.

If this thread is not intended as a wind up. Adults will only expect tea or coffee at a child's party.

Times have changed, and not for the better. I remember musical chairs, cheese and pineapple on sticks and a piece of cake to take home wrapped in kitchen roll!

Yep honestly you’re spending money in all the wrong places for a 5 year old.
town hall £35
bouncy castle hire £60
£100 in aldi on party food/plates and table decs /couple packs balloons/couple of Colin caterpillar cakes or Similar and some felttips for pass the parcel prize / multi packs of smarties or haribo

balloons loose on the floor for them to play with.

party bags from eBay. Fill bags with haribo, smartie boxes, a ballon and a glow stick and slice of cake

I mean it’s still £200 odd, but more doable than fancy cake and ballon arch

soft play hire will be cheaper than a party at home with all bells and whistles. You’re focussing on the wrong thing. A five year old will be just as happy with a 99p bag if balloons blown up and scattered round the room, Costco sell massive sheet cakes for £15 with all sorts of designs-not home made bakery no, but tasty enough and look fine. Pass the parcel, musical chairs, make your own party bags and chicken nuggets/sandwiches etc buffet. Five year olds are so easily pleased, don’t over think it.

Yes, I also go for a couple of Colins and get a bunch of balloons from the Card Factory. The children honestly don't mind what cake, as long as it is full of sugar.

A balloon arch and a £75 are not necessary. Just because you see this stuff on insta doesn't mean you have to have it.

I made a balloon arch myself...I bought a kit online. Cost me less than £10.

Buy a cake from m&s or Waitrose for about £15.

There's no way I would spend £190 for a balloon arch or £75 for a cake. Just blow up some balloons and buy a supermarket cake!