to think SIL should tell me if her DDs coming to christening?

[HelpMeRhonda]

My DD is being christened. SIL and her DH and kids invited. She says she will come and maybe 2 of her DDs. It is tomorrow. 20 or so people, I didn't invite some of my family due to lack of space. She hasn't given any reason why she doesn't know if they will come. I think she is being rude. How am I supposed to know how much food to make?

tell her that. say sorry, but you need exact numbers for catering.

Phone her and ask her to make a decision.

How nmany DCs does she have in total? and how old are they? I am naively thinking that a couple of unsexpected little ones would not make much difference in your catering plan but if they are growing teenagers it is a bigger problem maybe.

Yes teenagers, so I would assume they would eat adult portions, more or less.

But it's not just the catering, it also seems so inconsiderate. I wouldn't do this to someone else without very good reason and an apology.

In that case I would just call her and ask her who is actually coming.

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Teenagers start to get a bit funny about family occations at this age. Your SIL probably doesnt know what type of mood or how arkward they will be by the time tommorow comes.

Its a different ball game when your DCs are older and you have to let them make their own desisions sometimes. But also they are old enough to have some curtisty too. Give her a ring back and ask if she knows numbers yet so you know who to cater for.

Is there a history of dislike between you and your SIL? If not then tis seems awfully petty. What kind of food are you making? Surely the uncertainty of one or two younger guests isn't going to impact that much on the cost of the food, at least not in the same way as it might for a wedding?

I think YABU to be stressing about it so much to be honest.