Not quite sure - opinions genuinely sought

[olgafromthevolga]

Back story - DP and I get on great but are living apart for many reasons but are seriously looking at whether we can get back together as a family. I have two DS's from previous relationship and we have another son together, so a family of 5

Many months ago, we got tickets for a music festival and planned to go altogether, DS's are really excited. DP has just told me he may not have enough money to go, so we should cancel. Money was an issue between us, but I would sub im

However, my question is, am I being unreasonable to think that this has been in the calendar for a while, so pulling out now is a bit off?

"h"im, obviously

If you have already got the tickets, then I would consider that a commitment and would think he is BU to pull out.

But... if money was an issue between you, maybe he is trying to do the best thing by not asking you for a handout. have you paid for the tickets? Would you be able to re-sell them?

Yes, I don't think he's being fair on you. Could you not go on your own with the dcs? Is there any way he knew you would offer to bail him out if he did this...(suspicious mind)

I'd go without him. Why disappoint yourself and your DC because he doesn't now want to go?

I'd sell his ticket to a friend, parent or brother/sister, and the two of you and the 3 boys go and have fun without old mardy-pants whinging about money.

I would go without him but (pathetically) I have no idea how to put tent up and the thought of me alone with 3 kids at festival worries me - can I do it on my own? Would there be someone to help with tent etc?

Have a practice run in the backyard with the tent. I'm sure someone will help you if you get into difficulties at the festival. You can do it!

Go without him and PRACTISE putting the tent up beforehand!

What the others have said- have a trial run with the tent and go without him. You will feel competent and fabulous- lots of women go to festivals with just their kids. Or take a friend that you can have a laugh with.

Do not sub him, if he really wants to put himself out for his family and you, he will find it. I'm afraid you have to be a big strong girl and show him you are prepared to do it anyway. Go without him, bring another friend if need be, make the point to him. I'm sure he will do some thinking then!

Practise with the tent, if you get into a muddle someone will help you. Just think how great you'll feel having done it anyway. And sell his ticket to someone who does want to go (if this is the one on 15th of this month a) I'm green with envy, b) someone is bound to give their right arm for it).

But you're right - if he's known about it this long, he could've budgeted for it.

You should go ... it might well be the stress release you need.

Do it yourself if you want to avoid any arguments

I challenge any couple to get to a music festival, lug the stuff to a suitable bit of campsite, put up a tent and not have an argument...

but after that it is usually a great experience for everyone

Thanks for all the responses...computer died last night!

OK...I will have a practice run with the tent and leave him at home to eat cold beans on toast!

You may also come across a lovely young gentleman who will help you put up your tent... Your dcs will love going alone with you I'm sure