to feel insulted that DH work wants a letter from me saying he is my childs father?

[nymphadora]

and therefore entitled to parental leave?
We are married & he has a copy of my MATB1 so not like there is any issue over name etc.

Is it normal for me to write?

I have phoned my HR , we work in the same place but differnet depts, she is getting someone to look into some of the issues for me. She was flumoxed by the letter thing too.

TBH Sept/Oct are going to be even worse from his POV so not looking likely I'll get much support until he is off and there is potential for being on call which we are trying to clear up.

YANBU.

I would feel a bit miffed and insulted too.

Cheeky buggers.

I would write a letter explaining how distressing you find their attitude. That they are causing distress and upset to a pregnant woman who is not even their employee and who has no contractual relationship with them as a company.

That they have recieved a copy of the MATB1 form which is all the confirmation that they need that your husband is your child's father.

That you do not understand why they are pursuing you for additional proof of parentage, are they questioning you and your DHs assertion (as given when the MATB1 form was supplied) that he will be the child's father?

That you hope they will now grant your DHs reasonable and legal request for PL.

They will get the message you are v. pissed off, while still having your confirmation.

Am hopping mad on your behalf.

Spoke to HR who have majorly backtracked

Good!

Isn´t it still the case that if you are married then your husband is assumed to be the father of your child?

yes

yes and if you are NOT married to the father, you can't put the father on the birth certificate unless he comes with you to registra.

good, they knew they didnt have a leg to stand on!

If someone had asked me when I was pregnant if my husband of 4 years was the baby's father I'd have been deeply insulted. YANBU. How dare they!

Even if your DH wasn't the baby's biological father, if he is co-parenting, its none of their business anyway! If it was me, I'd be writing to your DH's HR department as a family member offended by their policy.

how incredibly heavy handed.

Never heard something so ridiculous. Yes I would feel insulted! Just to jazz it up a bit tho you could go on Jeremy Kyle for a DNA test then send his employer the episode on DVD?

I have spoken to HR about how offended I was!

Part of me is regretting it now as I could have written a really interesting one but I was too busy being insulted

that's another thread surely?