Anyone want to continue the fascinating convo on EBF? Thread title was something like: 'bfing a 2 yo is weird'

[SpeedyGonzalez]

Didn't realise I was posting the last post!

Thanks Speedy
Just marking my place!

I find it soooo strange stopping a child from getting what nature intended them to. I'm grateful for formula, I have a child who wouldn't have survived had it not been for formula, at the same time I have a 26mo who still bfs and I can't imagine stopping simply because it wouldn't make any sense. How bizzare to pull a dedline age out of your backside to stop a child breastfeeding.

My dad often tells me how he still remembers bfing, he was born in the war and poverty and his mum would feed him and a couple of other kids in the neighbourhood, he fed until he was five or so.

I can't even comprehend the debate, it's the normal thing to do.

I think BFing or not or for how long is such a tiny part of parenting and women who don't BF get so much pressure and feel the need to explain themselves, it's a shame, noone should be made to feel like it. At the same time though to judge what's normal as weird... I assume the thread title could read "a 12 month old" or "a three yo", it's all so abstract isn't it? Who makes this up?

I keep forgetting to respond to CakenadRoses question about calling it 'boobie'.

I never consciously decided to teach him the words boob/boobie, that's just what I call them.
My mum called them boobs growing up so it just followed.

Breastfeeding, I think we've all established, is a natural activity. But it fell out of fashion and returned back into fashion not all that long ago. If you've been brought surrounded by bottle-feeding and are unfamiliar with breastfeeding then you might, quite easily, be uncomfortable with it. Many new mums find the whole thing 'weird' - I know one that bottle fed child #1 because, age 18, the idea of breastfeeding just terrifed her. Four years later she is less insecure and child #2 she's breastfeeding. So if someone has overcome their discomfort to feed their baby but can't visualise feeding a toddler .... I don't think that makes them a bad person.

DD used to call it "see-see" and pat my chest just above my left boob (not grab my top and pull it down). She self weaned. Now she calls her dummy "see-see." I guess it means "comforting thing to suck"

Really, the word for it can be anything provided the parent and child both know what it means.

LOL, DS comes through to my bed in the night with his arms up in the air yelling "boooo-bie,boooo-bie", like it's a football team to support

Neither breast feeding or bottle feeding are weird. Comes down to personal choice. Either choice should be respected.

Gobsmack - I particularly like the last paragraph of your post. This is just a natural thing to do but there is to much judging of mothers who FF and mothers who BF.
A friend told me the other day that another mum we both know commented "Ses is still BF? She's mad!!!" I was a bit hurt and angry - mad to BF my 13mo DS??! I think I'm fortunate that - eventually - BF came easily and DS still enjoys it.

I wasn't on the earlier thread but discussion of what your children call it reminded me that my DS used to call it "boat." I've no idea why! My younger DS doesn't call it anything but headbutts my chest to get access!

I am feeling very shocked at my repeated use of the exclamation mark.

TSC you choose to overlook the important factors/benefits of EBF. Of course by three years old a child will usually have a well rounded intake of diet and fluids and could survive without BM, most do!. Some parents and children choose to continue BF as they enjoy the experience, closeness & nutrition it provides.

One EBF doucumentay I watched interviewed two young girls (around 7 & 9 the eldest self weaned around 7ish after losing the ability to latch on) both were asked why they wanted to BF and they said they loved the taste and cudding with their mum in the morning. They didn't feel strange as it was forced, natural continuation of their BF relationsip and reached a natural end, (youngest was losing latch ability during filming). Both girls appeared intelligent, independent, and had very clear views.

As far as, Shock horror, being forced to endure watching 6yo children stopping play and running for a drink of BM at the park. Can't say I have ever experienced this. Most mothers who BF after 12mo choose to feed at home due to fear of negative reaction in public.

Sorry TSC, but saying someone's arguments are juvenile is a bit much, especially when you don't seem to give reasoned arguments.

Inability to argue properly is about the only thing I openly judge.

TBH, after having to deal with the needs of a FF baby at every outing (bottle, milk, keep it sterile, keep it cool, keep it warm, cup or water when she was older etc.) I thoroughly enjoy not having to worry about whether I have a water bottle with or not. I usually do because, let's face it, when he plays in the hear he's after water mostly, but I don't have to worry about it iyswim

Oooh - am glad to see the discussion isn't over yet. When DS starts talking I hope to teach him to say 'milk' but given that I naturally use 'boob/boobie' I fear that he will too . And about them being to old when they can ask - I think it is an excellent point that denying DS when he learns to ask would be punishing him for expressing himself. It just doesn't sit right with me.

Before I had him I never gave any thought to how long we would continue to bf for - I suppose I just thought it would be a natural thing but so many people (including my best friend) started asking how long we were going to carry on almost as soon as he was born. My gut reaction has always been 'As long as we want to'. Maybe I'll want to stop before he does and we'll cross that bridge when we get there but I fail to see how it is anyone else's business. I don't comment on other people's parenting choices, why should they have right to comment on mine?

TSC I was in the middle of an apology when my computer went mental and crashed.

After re-reading your post I realised you weren't slamming EBF rather when where it is done.

I can understand why you would feel uncomfortable/ concerned about bullying in this instance but I woud say that knowing children are inquisitive and innocent (we hope) if it is something new they will naturally be interested and like all situations with children their reaction would be based on how the information/situation is dealt with by adults. BF is natural and why we have breasts and maybe some of those children will be encouraged to understand this and choose to BF/ encurage their partner to BF.

If the child views BM as a normal part of their day it would be a shame to make them feel wrong or ashamed for wanting it.

How would you deal with your Lo seeing women topless sunbathing, nudist beeches, sex eduation, human biology, evolution????

Yawn. Again.

I remember back in my parent's day people were not so interested in dissecting the details of what everyone else did in their lives, judging them and constantly commenting on them.

They just got on with looking after their own family without sticking their oar in anyone else's.

This criticism goes for people both in the for and against camps of the FF argument. Do what you want to do for yourself. And shut the fuck up about what anyone else wants to do.

My DD is 1 this month and I have no intention of stopping BFing any time soon. I reckon I will breastfeed until she self weans herself, but certainly not at 7!!!

Snobear4000 - Cobblers. Gossip is partically the only thing that separates us from animals. It is a defining human trait.

Sorry TSC, I was trying to be civilised, regardless of the infuriating nature of our interactions on these threads.

I'm not actually going to respond to your last post, clearly pointless trying to have a reasonable debate. In which, you know, people respond to what people have actually said.

May I just point you in the direction of this little thread I began earlier, having AIBU hidden I missed the one here!

I can't be bothered to write out my answers to Cakes all over again so maybe she will go and read it when she has a moment.

cheears