AIBU to be slightly pissed off with MIL?

[DetectivePotato]

I know another MIL one but it just happens that she is the one who has done something to bug me. If it had been anyone else I would have felt the same.

I am 8 weeks pregnant and DH told his mum a few weeks ago along with instructions that she wasn't to tell anyone else as its early days etc.

DH ran into his aunt the other day and told her. Bless him he is excited but I figure its up to him as much as me who he wants to tell so I wasn't bothered. DH met his sister yesterday. They aren't that close and we see her about twice a year. I asked him if he told her and he said she already knew. Just because DH told his aunt, MIL rang SIL and told her when she was told not to do this. DH was not happy and said it wasn't her business to tell anyone, it was up to us who we wanted to tell and when. Plus I think DH enjoys sharing the news himself as much as I do. As this is likely to be our last one, we want to be the ones to tell people in our own time.

MIL had no apology, just a "hmm". She is also not happy with me as DH told her I may not be able to make FIL bday party as I am feeling really really rough with being pregnant, having M.E. and looking after a 2 year old.

AIBU to be annoyed that she purposely done the one thing we asked her not to? I know it isn't a huge deal but it pisses me off when people completely ignore what you say.

I would have been pissed off if she had told someone outwith the family, but I don't think telling her daughter is all that unreasonable, especially since DH told his aunt so she probably has thought that its now okay to say.

Maybe give her a time - "don't tell anyone before I have the scan/am three months" or whatever suits.

She knew the time scale, not until 12 weeks basically. I know DH told his aunt but IMO it didn't give her permission to go and tell anyone, even her DD who she doesn't see that often anyway. I do see your point though.

SIL is not a great aunt, thats why DH wasn't bothered about telling her I think. She shows no interest in DS, took 3 months 2 give him a bday card and that was only because MIL passed it on. SIL lives about 15 minutes away and couldn't even be bothered to let us know that she wasn't coming to DS's party. She won't be interested in this baby either.

I'm not trying to drip feed btw, just saying that she isn't exactly a doting aunt.

Does it really matter who told who what in the scheme of things? Famlies get excited over new babies and like to be part of the excitment. Let it go and enjoy your pregnancy.

I dont think I would have been able to keep it from my dd when ds told me he was going to be a Daddy.I'd certainly be fed up if they had told others before they told dd.
I think YABU in this case.

You didn't honestly expect to drip feed the information to the family and not expect people to start talking about it though, did you?

We told parents ONLY first by phone, then waited until the 3 month scan and told the rest of the family by email at the same time - and rang a few of the closer members of the family to tell them in person at the same time as the email.

You told your aunt, so I really don't think you can be that upset that your MIL told your SIL, regardless of whether she is a good aunt, or not. (And why would she be a great aunt of she and your DH aren't close anyway?!)

she is probably just excited...i remember telling my mum i was pregnant with DD2 at about 9 weeks and saying don't tell anyone till after the scan, 5 mins later her friend walkks through the door and before she has even said hello my mum blurts out "she's pregnant"

i assume SIL doesn't have kids of her own, could she be jealous?

TBH, it sounds a bit silly to me. First nobody is supposed to know, then you start telling random family members, then you get annoyed because MIL told someone. If you're bending the "rules", then I don't see the harm in your MIL bending them too.

I would have thought you probably have far more important things to be worrying about!

Yabu