Please mumsnet jury let me have your opinion as I am worried that I have been unreasonable.
Will try to summarise.....
Ex P and I split three years ago when DS was 2. Ex P has now moved to another town as sees DS very irregularly (around once per six weeks but is unreliable and short notice). Ex P has a DD who is 12 who lives abroad with her Mum.
It is DS's birthday party on saturday - I am having it at home and have invited 7 four and five year olds to come and organised party games food etc all on my own.
Ex P calls yesterday to say that he will come and collect DS and take him overnight until Saturday (think this is the second or third time he has done so).
He then added "oh by the way there will be my DD at his party"
I was a bit surprised and just saw red (had a traumatic day as was DS's settling in day at school which I may add Ex P did not ask about).
I feel that he wants to dump his DD on me for some free childcare (highly likely he has made plans with his pals here to meet in pub for football).
I said no as the party is all organised now for four and five year olds so it would not be appropriate for his DD to be there at such short notice. She is 12 and will know me and DS so I woudl find having her there another thing for me to worry about as I'd want her not to feel left out, yet I'm already a bit stressed with organising party with so many children.
Now I feel that I have been unreasonable and should have just said "oh great DS will love that".
What do you think? (sorry so long!)