to feel uneasy about dp going to Grand Prix Silverstone with ex-wife and ds

[Tablefor6]

To cut a long story short...

His ex bought his ticket as a birthday gift last September, this I knew.

What I didn't know until recently was that she had also bought tickets for herself and their ds. (At this point they'd been seperated 18 months)

He failed forgot to mention this and I had to find it out from a friend of his, who inadvertently asked did I not want to go and watch the race & put the cat amongst the pigeons?? So on questioning that statement found out the ex was going to!!

Our relationship is solid and I know 100% he wouldn't look at her twice. He started divorce proceedings 4 weeks ago.

I think I'm starting to feel uneasy as my friends in RL are giving me a hard time about him going, and I've told them surely I'm doing the right thing letting him go to show how secure we are as a couple?

He has said he will not go if it upsets me.

He is a huge F1 fan, and I think he has only thought of it as a free ticket rather than an outing with the ex!

The grown woman in me says let him go....

What do you think?

Diehard F1 fans will do anything to go to Silverstone.

I wouldn't have a problem with it, it'll be too noisy for them to talk anyway!

Is it for the weekend or just the Sunday?

Well I'd think it was a bit odd that he didn't mention it and a bit odd that ex-wife wanted to go with him. Unless is it for their DS's benefit.

But yes - he should go but be upfront with you in the future.

Let him go. If they can still be civil as a family it will be a great example to his son.

They have a child together. They have to have some sort of relationship for the child. I think it's good that they are going together. Very grown up I think.

But he should have been open with you and told you. That would have annoyed me no end.

I would "let" (not sure that's the right word) him go because I've been to the F1 thingy and most of the day is just eating lovely food & drinking champagne in a marquee interspersed with occasionally sitting with earplugs in watching cars going round and round in a circe (v v boring).

As his ds will be there and as it's such a public place I don't think anything will happen. The only concern I may have is that they'll be travelling together and possibly having conversations you'd rather they didn't .

BUT they've been separated for such a long time now I'm sure you have nothing to worry about.

mumble it is the car journey I probably feel the most uncomfortable with.
A mutual friend works with his ex-wife, and has had to listen to her laughing about certain a thing that happened between dp & myself a few months ago

Dp called me her name ONCE, complete slip of the tongue, but I did kind of get shirty about it, and in a non thinking sort of a way he thought it a good thing to share with the ex whilst collecting his ds for the weekend! I was not happy as his ex had apparently really milked it at work & laughed that he had used her name and how great she sthought it was.
Dp is known for opening of mouth and engaging brain some minutes later.

Ladycad he will be there for the weekend. Sharing a twin room with ds.

I am going to go against the tide here

I would NOT like it, and yes its unreasonable but Id probably rather he did not go, fuck the F1
but I am a jealous person

your friends need to stop shit stirring too

i cant see the problem
i have 4 kids with my ex and we do stuff together all the time, his gf knows theres not anything in it except for the fact that we are still friends and have 4 little kids between us

This is a one off I hope....we do family things together with his ds every weekend, I have 3 dc from a previous relationship.

harleyd very admirable that you can continue to have that relationship for your childrens sake, and he must have a very understanding gf!!

i dont think its admirable really, i know i am very lucky to be able to have the relationship i do with my ex, i have a good relationship now too with his gf and it makes things so much easier. i know it doesnt work out this way for the majority of break-ups

Dp as asked some months ago to join them on their summer hol abroad for 2 weeks, he has said no to that, as we think it sends the wrong message to ds who has been very confused about the split. (mothers day this year he asked if Daddy could come & make breakfast in bed) This is 2 yrs down the line.
His ds has been away with us for 2 weeks last month, and will go with his Mum and grandma in August.
His ds is a fab little lad, who enjoys being part of this big family....he has said it is more fun here
In a 7yr olds eyes I think "fun" equates to having 3 other kids to play with.

Table - do you think the ex is after your DH?

Because if not - I don't think its a big problem really.

traceybath I think after a 19yr marriage she has continued with 'routine' e.g she still spends ridiculous amounts of money on him at christmas and birthdays.
She's been heard at work saying "no-one will know him (dp) like I know him"

Maybe a case of don't want him, but don't want anyone else to have him? (She asked him to leave the marriage)

He has said when he looks at her he feels nothing for her.

She has agreed to the divorce proceedings, not contesting at all, so surely she is over him?

Dp's ex asked if he would go on holiday with them (typo) not dp asked!