Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

to have left 2.4yo dd downstairs on her own whilst i had a shower.........?

45 replies

diamondsandtiaras · 22/06/2010 13:34

Due to having a bad cold and being up all night with a snotty/teething baby, I really couldn't be bothered to argue with DD1 (2.4) this morning when she refused to come upstairs with me so I could shower etc. So I put Peppa on for her and left her in the living room.

We have quite a small house and wooden floors, so I would have heard her if she was moving around. We have locks on all the kitchen cupboards/drawers too so she wouldn't have been able to get hold of anything to hurt herself with. I was in the shower for about 3 minutes and then kept calling down to her every couple of minutes whilst I got dressed etc (to ask if she was ok and what she was doing). I was upstairs for I guess about 15 mins in total (during which time she didn't move from in front of her DVD!)

Was I being U and slightly irresponsible?

OP posts:

Rockbird · 22/06/2010 13:59

Well I don't have an ensuite or a flat and our house is stupidly laid out so that the bedroom door opens right onto the stairs (stupid Victorians ) so downstairs is the safest place.

Stealth has it. You can tell by their mood pretty much what they're going to do. Sometimes I wouldn't leave her (DD not Stealth!).

VuvuzelaPlenticlew · 22/06/2010 13:59

We have no downstairs (in a flat) but I leave DS (2.10) in front of his current DVD of choice and take DD (7 weeks) in with me in her little swing.

skidoodly · 22/06/2010 14:01

YANBU, but I wouldn't do this.

First of all, I don't really like DD (2.3) to watch TV much and never when I'm not there to talk to her about it.

Second of all, like qk I wouldn't leave her with the run of downstairs for 15 minutes. Unless your rooms are completely empty of all objects, they're not "childproof". There's a lot a two year old could get up to in that time that is not safe.

I don't know, to me toddlers need to be supervised all the time unless they are in a cot or playpen they can't get out of.

My DD is very independent, but I like to be in the room with her (even if mostly not focused on what she's doing). 15 minutes upstairs wouldn't sit comfortably with me.

But you know your child, your home, and your own feelings about what is safe and what is not.

domesticdiva · 22/06/2010 14:21

YANBU! I leave our DS whos 15 months downstairs by himself to have a shower/quick jobs upstairs! Everything is on lock down i.e cupboards, kitchen out of bounds, fireplace etc etc with child proof gadgets so I know he can't do anything to hurt himself. He likes to expore around by himself and I think it gives them a sense of independence too.

sue52 · 22/06/2010 14:32

As long as there are no sharp objects or live wires around, go ahead and shower.

petisa · 22/06/2010 14:37

As others have said OP yanbu, though it depends on the child and how childproofed the area is.

I usually bring my dd (2.2) upstairs with me as there's a gate at the top and she likes to wreak havoc upstairs while I shower (sorry to be pedantic judyblue but it's wreak havoc not reek havoc lol) but I've been leaving her downstairs for short periods while I put laundry away etc since she was born, really. I would have no probs with 15 mins now she's older, especially if she was watching tv, as she's currently totally obsessed with the teletubbies and would not move an inch while watching it!

ChippingIn · 22/06/2010 14:43

Sorry petisa - there is a board for pedants - it really is rude to correct other people on the general boards.

Diamonds - YANBU. It's not the most relaxing way to have a shower, but sometimes the only way!!

Ezma · 22/06/2010 14:44

Phew, glad I'm not the only one that does this! If DS wasn't occupied with playing whilst I got ready for work there is no way we would be out of the house on time! Never told anyone that I do this in RL for fear of being shot down!

So no, YANBU, but it all depends on safety of your house, temperament of child (both on the day and generally ie. if DS in particularly destructive/ Houdini like mode then it's not a good idea to leave him alone)and not leaving them for massively long periods of time either to create havoc or glued to the TV. Each of us knows what our own DC is capable of, our own house etc etc. so we are probably all able to make a judgment on that basis as to what works best for us.

petisa · 22/06/2010 15:02

I don't correct usually Chipping but reek made me laugh! I imagined toddlers running riot round the house with skunks or letting off stinkbombs

Original poster

diamondsandtiaras · 22/06/2010 15:09

wow loads of responses! Thanks everyone. I honestly thought everyone would declare me U and tell me never to do it again!

Can't remember who asked but the baby was in the bouncy chair upstairs watching me shower........I wouldn't leave the 2 of them alone together (DD1s latest trick is to attempt to pick the baby up and bf her......)

OP posts:

acebaby · 22/06/2010 15:58

at the poster who could leave her 2.6 yo with her laptop. My 2.1 yo would wreck mine! But nevertheless I do leave him downstairs for short times in our relatively childproof house.

lol at the bfing. DS1 (2.9 when DS2 was born) used to do bf his doll when I fed DS2. He would keep up a running commentary on the doll's latch and complain constantly about how thirsty or hot he was

isoldeone · 22/06/2010 16:19

No I wouldn't. Like an earlier poster said no room is totally childproof. A recent sad story was a death of a child in the midlands area who got tangled up in blinds . The child was 3 and had been left watching tv happily. The house was a huge beautiful placeand the parents were campaigning to raise awareness about the blinds on the local news. The coroner as I recall made remarks about supervision. It made me hesitate about having a Venetian blind for my 9mths nursery and I may remove it when he gets older even though pull cords have been placed well out of reach. But there you go. I forsee showering with mine ( as I have started now) or waiting till dh is home and doing it then.

Adair · 22/06/2010 16:23

Ha, accebaby, I wouldn't leave ds for a second! Dd was an entirely different kettle of fish...

Agree re blinds, am utterly paranoid about them. Though lots of the stories are about 6yo or older children and you kinda think well, you HAVE to leave them alone at some point. Scary though.

Adair · 22/06/2010 16:24

(I mean, with my laptop. Dd used to watch iplayer - I liked that I could hear when she clicked on the next programme, so knew she was ok)

OrmRenewed · 22/06/2010 16:26

No. Of course not.

kodokan · 22/06/2010 16:28

Nope, YANBU. When DD was 2.3, we moved into a house with a very large garden wrapped around an outbuilding. I had to very quickly get over my parental paranoia that she went out of sight/earshot with DS of 6.3.

There wasn't anything really dangerous like water or rusty machinery and it was all fenced it, but they fell over, stung themselves on nettles, etc. The other one would always come to tell me. It's definitely easier having two out of sight rather than one, though.

Bet you leave your baby alone much earlier than 2.4 - god knows how I would be with number 3 or 4 child.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 22/06/2010 16:29

Cut the cords on venetian blinds so they can't loop round the neck

Of course YANBU to go and have a shower.

kodokan · 22/06/2010 16:29

Agree about blinds paranoia, though, although mine was more concerned with those toddler rucksacks hanging off door handles and DCs strangling themselves as they to put it on.

MIFLAW · 22/06/2010 16:53

Bloody hell

I do this every day!

Bad daddy!

MaudofallHopefulness · 22/06/2010 17:34

I'm always doing this, DS is 2 1/2.

Flip

1 2