To think that next time MIL comes to dinner, I should hand her a takeaway menu?

[chipmonkey]

and tell her to choose her own food as nothing I cook is ever good enough?

We had fillet steaks today which I ordered specially from our lovely butcher for Fathers Day as FIL loves a nice steak.

I knew she liked it well-done so served it up well-done. I was in the kitchen when dh appeared with her steak saying it needed a bit more time. Fair enough.

So he brings it back in to her, she picks at it and then hands it over to FIL with a sneery face saying "you have that, it's medium rare, you can see the blood"

Now by the time I had cooked it and dh had further cooked it it was very well-done indeed to the point of being burnt, IMO and there was no blood in sight!

I know she was doing it to get at me,she does it every time and I am very, very fed up of it. So AIBU?

Oh and YANBU OP!

YANBU. I do takeaway with the PiL as they refuse to eat anything I cook (except for frozen pizza). Lost the will to even try after they visited while I was 39 weeks pg and bought and ate a sandwich while in the playground with DD. No sandwich for DD or me though!

Egg bound Sloany?

that is HYSTERICAL!!!!

This shouldn't be your problem, it should be DH's it is his parents.

Either get him to tell you what MIL cooked when he was young and go with a v simple version of that or get him to ask them what they like when on his own with them.

Alternatively just make as little effort as possible. I have more or less given up cooking for DH's family as although they are lovely, I used to go to quite a lot of effort to make nice things when they came. i knew they liked them as they would be eaten up, but little thanks or appreciation given, so now I do fish portions with oven chips, or spag bol as its easy to make and doesn't take much time.

They could also just be old, cranky and hard to please.

I would have said "Do you mean please could you cook my steak for a bit longer Mrs Chipmonkey?" with a nice smile and whisked it away into the kitchen.
I wouldn't invite them often.

Agree I wouldn't waste fillet steak on people who like it well done, complete waste of money. Fried minute steak sounds sensible.

Forget about her, she has no manners.
She clearly does not know about food either. I remember once in a restaurant somebody ordered a well done beef, the guest had chosen a really good cut of meat, but well done. The head chef, a bit of a primadonna I expect, came out and said the following to the customer "Sorry, but I refuse to ruin such a good cut of meat, so I suggest you reorder either a more inferior cut, or accept it medium rare! There is absolutely NO POINT in ordering this particular cut well done - you can have any cheap cut well done, and it will taste the same"

I loved watching the face of the other guest in the restaurant, and that of his female companion.

CM, I feel for you.

Tis the curse of the Irish mammy-in-law.

Mine thinks that unless dh has ten ton of potatoes on his plate, half a cow and a whole cabbage that he's not being fed properly.

"Eggbound" is one of my favourite words. When I was 13 we went on a school trip to Italy, and Jason Blythe had to be hospitalised after eating 25 hard-boiled eggs in one go as no-one else wanted them. Wonder what the Italian equivalent was on his hospital notes .....

I'm a veggie, but once spent £45 on a piece of beef for DH and the inlaws for Boxing Day at a holiday cottage - MIL insisted on cooking it to a cinder. DH said it had as much flavour as one of Mother Theresa's sandals.

I got this all the time from my darling MIL. Everything, and I mean Everything I cooked - she didn't like lamb (yet ate the whole lot like an old hog), she was allergic to the custard on the trifle (is not allergic to custard as I have seen her eating it on manys the occasion). So when my DD was christened I ordered some food from the chinese. Guess what? She didn't like chinese. So I completely ignored the jibes and comments and I left her to eat it or starve. When she thought I wasn't looking she ate a big feed of it. I think it must be just a thing MIL's learn at the course they have to attend "HOW TO MAKE YOUR DAUGHTER IN LAW FEEL SHITTY"

Mine eats my food but gives me really really measly servings whenever we visit her - like laughably small (amd I am not overweight before anyone starts).

I now take my own snacks when we go.

What kind of packet soup? I'm sorry but I am fixated on this idea....

Packet soup with the little rock hard red carroty bits?

It wouldn't matter what you gave her, she'd find something wrong with it and if she couldn't find something wrong with it she'd find another reason why she couldn't enjoy it. She sounds like one of those mothers who just cannot accept that her DS now favours another woman over her.

Urgh, I feel your pain... Last time I cooked for XP's folks, I did roast beef - and had to cremate it, as his Mum prefers it that way, even though XP, my folks (who were also round for dinner), and I prefer it medium rare... And also had to cook fish and separate potatoes for his Dad, who wouldn't eat beef or roast potatoes.

Luckily he gave me the flick soon after, so I haven't had to cook for the fussy feckers again .

Seriously though, when I go to anyone's house for dinner, I eat what I'm given, even if it is something I don't ordinarily eat... Your MIL sounds like a right PITA.

And well done steak? Boak. What a giant waste of good beef. Serve her Quorn fillets the next time.

Erin packet soup I'd guess...reason why when Erin is on baby names all Irish posters think of soup.... My MIL love to fry everything to 'finish it off', her baked beans finished in the frying pan are quite something.

Is Erin packet soup anything like gravy? Or Cup a soup? Does it have the rock hard carroty bits? what flavour is it? How could anyone substitute soup for gravy? Where's the OP?!

I think there might be Erin gravy too? I think they have a range of packet 'soup', and cuppasoup. I think my MIL would find the soup as gravy was haute cuisine.

Hmm, Erin packet soup comes in multiple flavours... Am guessing the OP's MIL uses Oxtail instead of gravy... Love Oxtail soup, but not actually on food...

They make Cup a Soup also.. Namely Erin 'Hot Cup'. Is vile.

my dad is the same so I never cook, every time my parents visit we either get a takeaway or we eat out - so much less stress. On the occasions where eating out isn't practical i.e. Christmas I put everything out on the table and they serve themselves, then they only take what they fancy much easier

In terms of her cooking style, I'm wondering if we're not related, that was a pretty good description of my step mum.

Don't you just daydream about serving her up a completely incinerated steak and saying 'I think you'll find that well done'. Then if she didn't want to eat it, there's nothing you could do to make it palatable. (Make sure it's cheap steak first though)

Given that that will just remain a daydream, I don't know if there's anything you can do about people who are just plain rude. Judge her against your own standards. You hate each others cooking but you eat hers and say thankyou that was lovely. She doesn't. You have better manners.

Can you get your children to help you out? Mine have been known, with a little prompting, to discuss their table manners at friends houses - 'they served me x which I hate and I ate it because I was too polite to say no' - which would lead naturally on to 'granny, why aren't you eating the lovely dinner that mum has made you'... ?

No this was vegetable soup, with those little bits of dried veg in the packet!

I do remember her serving it up to FIL once and he just said "Ah, don't be giving me that shlop!" in his Mayo accent!

Well... vegetable soup.... fuck my hat....

It's like she's been dreaming up ways to ruin a perfectly good roast dinner!?

Incinerated beef - check
Vegetables cooked to death - check
Replace gravy with packet soup - check

You'll be telling us she gives you Aunt Bessies Yorkshire puddings next!!