To ask DH to not open my post

[Threelittlemoomins]

Have had two letters in the last couple of days that DH has opened. He works from home and I'm often out when the post comes.

They're nothing personal, the first was a letter confirming my maternity allowance and the 2nd was a refund for a tax disc from the DVLA.

I don't think he would have opened them if it hadn't been obvious who they're from but I still felt a bit funny about it. I asked him not to open any more of
my post and he joked about me having an affair with someone from the DVLA - am I being really petty to ask him to keep his hands off anything addressed to me???

Is it illegal if your DH doesn't mind and actually wants you to see what's in the post so they don't have to bother

pmsl funnysinthegarden. that was a joke, right

I'd go mental so no yanbu. dh doesn't do this but does rifle through my handbag which sends me ballistic with rage. everyone is entitled to some personal space.

dh loves opening his post - he's like a small child - he'd be upset if I was opening it all. the only thing of his I do open is the credit card bill cos I pay it and it's mine in all but name really

I'm happy for dp to open my post, we share finances and unfortuanetly most of it is concerning money! Likewise, I open electricity bills etc that come addressed to him. I leave his personal post though (hand written envelopes) and would expect him to do the same.

My DH is totally uninterested in opening his own post, let alone mine, he doesn't even like answering the phone. So yes, I do open his post and quite honestly would like him to show some interest in mine (but he doesn't) - he's not even bothered to open his open birthday cards - not that he gets many!

DH often leaves his post for me to open. Particularly if he suspects it's to do with anything financial!

YANBU-I never open anyone else's post. I wouldn't dream of opening the DCs post-even when they were very young.

Sanfairyann, no not a joke. I genuinely have no problem with DH opening my post, rifling through my bag, looking at my email acc or even reading my posts on MN, and I expect the same from him. Would be very if he kept anything secret

Altkinkum, your post assumes that a DH would initiate a criminal prosecution of you opened his post. Totally absurd and not relevant here

sorry altinkum

funnysinthegarden that's hilarious

sorry the world of mumsnet is well freaky at times, think it's time I wandered back to the world of normal, mumsnet break obv called for

YANBU. I lived with my sister once and she thought it was quite OK to open up and read my magazine subscription. I asked her kindly not to open my post and she got quite made at me as though I was being petty. It is a basic respect issue, irrespective of the content.

I find it hard enough to open my own brown envelopes, never mind anybody else's. Frankly I'd be relieved if my DP opened all the nasty shite that comes through my door. But if something is hand-written or obviously personal, I would find it intrusive.

I'm happy for DH to open mine, but if he's not home and we're expecting something addressed to him and it arrives then I will phone and specifically ask permission to open it.

YANBU - agree with BitofFun and lovechoc (amongst others).

Yanbu.
It is absolutely nothing to do with "having something to hide". It is respecting another persons property.

YANBU. You need your privacy even if, or maybe especially, if you're married. If he thinks it's OK to open your post there may well come a day when he opens something very personal, or something that you've ordered for him as a present. I just think it's a no-no to open other people's post.

I have nothing to hide, it is just as gtamom says, you respect someone else's privacy and this includes absolutely everyone.

Agree - I open dps post (but that is on agreement), because if I didn't he never would. So I do it, pile it up in batches for him to go through and can point out when something needs paying - I don't actually read it IYKWIM. I would not open anything that looks like a private letter or whatever, and I never open his Amazon parcels as i know that would piss me off!

Principle IMO is that you don't open other people's post without asking...

My mother is the world's worst at this. I was totally shocked when she showed me once how she could steam open an envelope addressed to my Dad, look at the contents and then reseal it. (She missed her vocation as master spy, I think) Needless to say, I never trusted her around my own mail after tht!!

agree with others, it's got nothing to do with 'hiding' anything! that's just ridiculous. It's just basic manners and respect to leave people to open their own mail. Being married or in a partnership with someone doesn't mean you have this right to open all mail addressed to them.

I never open my mail..its all bills or junk..lol..I occassionally open DH's if asked but I have a letter avoidance problem tbh..I just hope i open the one with the million pound check it!!....I can totally understand about personal space..I'm not keen on people rifling through my bag..my sister did it a couple of days ago searching for 'chewing gum'..I really didn't like it..

I dont see the problem but if you dont like it then thats up to you

we dont open each others,its no big thing its just i like to open my own letters,never know might be a nice suprise inside..

Dh opens mine sometimes that makes me cross yet if I open his he goes mad but if I dont open it he gets cross too .

Ds1 is 16 and quite often gets packages and stuff and he always says to me open it and then text me so i know what it is.

So a parcel came I opened it,it was a t shirt ds had ordered - Dh went mad and called me a nosey cow....as soon as ds came in from college he was 'ohh your mum opened your parcel'......ds replied 'i ask her to open my mail!!'