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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell my SiL to eff off.

59 replies

textpest · 18/06/2010 18:02

My fiance sister is pregnant.........and a pain the the backside.

She has previouslty demanded money for things for her baby (not due till November), money for outfits for our wedding (not till next August) and is generally a pain about her pg and uses it as an excuse to do nothing/let people do things for her.

We are off to DP parents tomorrow for a family party and she is insisting I don't drink and collect her from/drop her at home because she is pregnant and her partner 'deserves a break from the baby stress and to have a drink'. My partner has a broken foot so isn't driving and pil will be too busy with their massive family to fetch her, I don't mand collecting her but don't see why she can't taxi home or walk pil say pregnancy is trouble free. AIBU to say no?

OP posts:
singsinthebath · 18/06/2010 19:15

Sorry biddysmama - didn't read your post properly

Dawnybabe · 18/06/2010 19:18

I was walking the dog on his usual two mile hike across the deserted bridleway on my due date.

WHAT a lazy cow.

mrsincommunicado · 18/06/2010 19:18

Don't be too sensitive just keep hitting her back with positive brick wall statements:

Her:Will you come and get me?

You: No you'll be fine, the walk will do you good.

Her: No it won't I'm tired

You: No you'll be absolutely fine, you and the baby will probably really enjoy the fresh air.Well have to go and see to my walking talking children byeeeeeee
etc etc

backtotalkaboutthis · 18/06/2010 19:20

Say no, obv. And down two glasses of wine in the first half hour so there's No Pressure later.

waitingforwaitrose · 18/06/2010 19:21

The nerve of the woman!

WhamBam · 18/06/2010 19:23

I wouldn't say anything at all, ignore her calls/texts etc and just arrive at the party and start drinking. Suit yourself love. She sounds like a spoilt brat.

Angelcat666 · 18/06/2010 19:39

YANBU Say no and have a drink.

IamBatman · 18/06/2010 19:57

YANBU, go with Lonnie's suggestion and enjoy yourself. Tell her it'll build character or something..

traceybath · 18/06/2010 20:02

Loving Fab's use of the word 'delicate'

You're obviously not being unreasonable but don't be too rude to her - she's famiiiily - said in best peggy mitchell stylee.

Original poster
textpest · 18/06/2010 20:46

Ha - she doesn't listen to anyone who disagrees with her. I have told her I will collect but not bring back and she told me I was "jealous" and just wanted her to not come.

She is on phone ot DP crying about how mean I am being but fortunately he is aware of what she is like and is watching football with her on loud speaker.

And no she isn't a teenager!

OP posts:
2rebecca · 18/06/2010 20:54

Time she learned to drive. I'd refuse to even go to the party if she is going to be so demanding. Walking for 20mins if only 16 weeks pregnant is nothing.
The fact that she was moaning at your husband and being manipulative because you refuse to be her personal chauffeur when her husband who is going to the party can't be bothered to drive her home is totally unreasonable.
I'd be having as little to do with her as possible and telling her she can walk there as well if she's going to be ungrateful.

TakeLovingChances · 19/06/2010 08:32

Talk about being a 'pregzilla'! I am guessing this is her 1st pregnancy?

She sounds like a me me me type of person, the type who thinks they are the first person to ever be pregnant. Very annoying.

YANBU to want to tell her to eff off, but you'd be made out as the worst in the world if you actually did say it.

I think she is BU. It's not as if she's 39 weeks pregnant, she's not due till November! That's 5 months away!

Megatron · 19/06/2010 08:40

Tell her she's pregnant not ill and to stop expecting everyone to run around after her. If she wants a lift to the party fine, but if she expects you to take her home again she better just stay at home as YOU are the one that needs a break from her bloody pregnancy. Cheeky cow.

dizzydixies · 19/06/2010 08:45

oh good grief, could you be arsed with her being such a PITA all the time?? Get caller ID and ignore/screen/ignore

Dlamis · 19/06/2010 08:51

Am at partner needing a break from baby stress.

How will the poor lamb cope when the baby is actually here!!!!!!!!!

BertieBasset · 19/06/2010 08:58

Just to add that if she can't afford £5 for a taxi, then her and her partner won't be able to afford a drink surely - be it soft or alcoholic.

Best they stop at home and save the pennies

MrsMiamla · 19/06/2010 08:59

agree with others, you have to put a stop to this now!

i'm 29wks pg with spd, DS is two and i spent most of yesterday walking round botanical gardens for dh's birthday.

YANBU and i really hope that someone tells her what she needs to hear very soon!

TartyMcFarty · 19/06/2010 09:16

at 'pregzilla'

Bumperlicious · 19/06/2010 09:31

Now I am usually sympathetic to the pg woman's plight and hate all the 'I was doing XY and Z up till the day I gave birth', it pissses me right off, when I struggle to walk 10 minutes from my car into work, not everyone's pg is easy.

However this woman does sound like she is being a PITA, and if the pg has been trouble free then I would tell her to bog off. I would tell her to bog off even if she is in a lot of pain and having trouble if she is demanding anything of you. Anything less than 'I'm really struggling, would you mind terribly helping me out' should be met with an eff off!

clam · 19/06/2010 12:48

Dlamis - On the contrary, if she's behaving like this all the time, then I have every sympathy with him. I'd be stressed too, if I were him.

But if her behaviour is causing his stress, then it's surely up to her to alleviate it (by stopping whingeing), rather than expecting the OP to do it her her.

GeekOfTheWeek · 19/06/2010 14:06

YANBU

Tell her to get fucked. Silly cow.

Put your foot down now.

This behavior should not be facilitated.

SoBloodyTired · 19/06/2010 14:17

Agree, offer to collect and let her make her own way home. If she doesn't like that offer she can make her own way there as well.

I loathe people like this. She won't enjoy the party anyway, everyone will be too busy enjoying themselves to peel grapes and fan her with palm fronds. Silly cow.

5DollarShake · 19/06/2010 14:23

This is her problem. Not yours? Why are you letting her make it yours (asked in the nicest possible way)?

Do NOT give in.

Mumcentreplus · 19/06/2010 14:52

what the??...I would not even give an answer...then after the fact i would say 'huh?...I thought it was a joke'..as 5Dollar said this is not 'your' problem!

Lotkinsgonecurly · 19/06/2010 14:59

Buy a new sim card from tescos just for the weekend and then find the original next week! Or go into your phone supplier , they're practically giving away pay as you go sims.