in thinking tiredness is NOT a competition?

[misdee]

have had a rough few nights with dd4, and other dd's were up early this morning, so am very tired.

dh works earlies usually, but day off today.

i said 'oh i'm tired could do with going back to bed'

usual reply from dh' at leats u slept last night, i didnt'

fgs every time i mention i am tired he has to be more tired, and i apparently sleep 10hours uninterrupted every night when he is up with the kids. yeah right

load of bollocks.

btw cant go back to bed as dd4 is awake and grumping.

We do competitive tiredness with an added frisson. Whilst we both work, the fact that he is the primary earner/provider will always trump a borderline decision re: whose time is more valuable. Not OVERTLY mind you, in a passive aggressive way ("I'm just trying to earn a living...."). Joy.

And if that doesn't do it, he can always bring up the fact that I STILL haven't passed my driving test....

(oh the joy of arguments in our house....)

It should be written in stone and made law - the woman is always the most tired. End of.

ExH was terribly competitve in the tiredness stakes.

When we came home from hospital after the birth of DC2 he was "exhausted" (bear in mind he had gone home for 8 hours after I gave birth and slept for the best part of that - I know this cos my mum was looking after DC1 at our house)

Anyway - His mother came to visit day after DC2 was born. ExH was sat on sofa with sleeping baby on lap, dozing, whilst I was sorting out toddler with lunch etc.... "Oh look at him bless him, he must be shattered" she quips about her precious wanker son. Toxic fucking bitch. Took all my efforts not to lamp the cow.

Luckily he fucked off when DC2 was a few weeks old so I've not had to put up with the old cow at all since

My current DH knows not to mention tiredness to me right now - Am 8mths pregnant at the mo and really not sleeping well at all. Had scan last week though - litle baby in there yawning away made me laugh.

I've found the best way is to opt out of competitive tiredness. Everyone thinks they're tireder (grammar) and harder working than anyone else and it really pisses them off if you say that you're feeling wide awake, happy, well-rested and oh yes, your job isn't too demanding. You can't win at moaning but you can make the moaners feel and look ridiculous. Very satisfying.

By ShinyAndNew - My mum once replied to a text I'd sent earlier at 2am. Thinking it was odd she was awake at 2am I rang her. She couldn't sleep because of my Dad's snoring. Dh was also snoring so we decided we would make ourselves a hot chocolate and have a chat since it was a Sunday morning and we were both off work.

Later in the day I dropped something off at their house and asked my Dad how he was. His reply was "Well I didn't sleep at all last night because your mother drank too much again and was snoring all night" grin

Oh that sounds SOOooo familiar.......... mind you my Mum gets her own back with panache

she's disables, needs a wheelchair........so bought a high powered water pistol & keeps it hidden under her mattress edge....... my Dad sleeps at the other side of the room...........when he snores she shoots him with it....... & he had me nearly choking on the phone as he's gone from....thinking the Ct had wee'd on his head.......the roof was leaking, but he was puzzled as couldn't find any sign on the ceiling.........to just been worried about how much he drools in his sleep.........poor old s@d STILL doesn't know its my Mum getting her own back

Otterlybotterly Thu 17-Jun-10 12:43:14
I've found the best way is to opt out of competitive tiredness. Everyone thinks they're tireder (grammar) and harder working than anyone else and it really pisses them off if you say that you're feeling wide awake, happy, well-rested and oh yes, your job isn't too demanding. You can't win at moaning but you can make the moaners feel and look ridiculous. Very satisfying.

I've tried that tact with DH....He just accused me of being sarcastic

rockin... your mum sounds like alot of fun! although i'm very pleased i don't have to ever share a room with her!!

oh goodness this is something we do all the time with each other and the thing is it only gets on each other's nerves and causes a row...wish we could stop it. There will be loads of it very soon when DC2 arrives next month....

OP hope you have managed to get a few hours in during the day. Try and get some help if you can.

My DD woke me up at 5.50 the other day and I was trying to impress on her that this was too early. The conversation went like this:

Me: Mummy's tired!
DD: No Mummy, I'm tired
Me: Well, you woke up early this morning.
DD: (Looking indignant) No, you woke up early.

Definitely a competition.

I used to be called "haventsleptforayear".

When it got to 2 and then 3, I changed it.

DH and I did a lot of this and it caused a lot of grief.

I have tried to quash the instinct!

The worse time for this is when babies are little (32 weeks pregnant and not looking forward to it again).

DH firstly starts complaining straight after the birth about how exhausting it was for him .

He then moans to everyone who will listen about how exhausted he is with a newborn. Fair enough maybe but he always goes and sleeps in the spare room when the DC are babies meaning he gets a full nights sleep whilst I BF every hour or so.

I have given up arguing

this has cheered me no end ladies

dh isnt all bad, he did just buy me lunch in town.

but i am still tired lol

God peppa DH did that with DS2 (whereas with DS1 he got DS up, brought him to me, burped and changed him and put DS back in his cot, whilst we both cooed over our pfb).

DS2 comes and DH "needs his sleep to look after DS1" so packs off to the spare-room for 6 months .

I went back to work at 3.5mths but apparantly did not need "my" sleep quite so much.

When he alludes to that period he says I was depressed.

Anytime I get broody I try to remember it all and it pulls me up sharp!

Also forgot DH and I work in the same place and i have lost count of the times people have said to me what a shame it is DH isn't getting much sleep as he's up most of the night with girls. They are actually being serious and it gets me so mad that they all believe him over me. Charming arse hole.

Sleep is a luxury and I have to be dragged out of bed on Sundays...I love it and I will never get enough!

Haha- we actually place bets in our house as to when my DS - no children will say Im sooooooooooo tired shortly after she has arrived to stay

• I think record is 30 secs .

Seriously take in turns to have lie at weekends -restored harmony in our house

Haha this has made me chuckle... same in our house. DP uneployed at the min and I work mon to fri 9-4. However when DSD is here at a weekend its ME that is up in the nught and at 6am (sometimes earlier) when she decides 'mummy its daylight outside its time to get up' Thing is I cant get mad as I love mine and her time in a morning, snuggle up on sofa and watch a movie until daddys alarm goes off, then silence is broken haha

AAARRRGGGG roll on winter and dark mornings again!!!