...to be cross with brother in law for ignoring new baby?

[BabyGiraffes]

My BIL has completely blanked the existence of dd2, now 4 mths old, and it is really annoying me. A card would have been nice? Probable reason is that he was hoping for a boy this time (!)... DH laughs it off but I find it really unfair that dd1 gets showered with presents and sweets and he just pretends dd2 does not exist. Not so much a problem while she is a baby, but surely I should eventually say something, or have I left it too late already?

I wouldn't worry yet-maybe he just isn't interested in babies. It will only become a problem if he treats them differently when they are old enough to realise-in which case you will have to make it clear to him that he must treat them equally-or you will not accept presents for DD1.

Thanks piscesmoon I guess it shouldn't bother me so much but you are right that I can't let it go on when the girls are older. What doesn't help is that he is the only remaining family dh has, so it would be even more obvious if one girl gets all attention...

See what happens but if he persists you will just have to make it quite clear. I think that once he sees her as a person it will change.Try getting him around when DD1 is out.