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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think you shouldn't take your drink back home with you after a party

73 replies

zerominuszero · 13/06/2010 21:47

We hosted an England game party last night and everyone who came brought beer, as you'd expect for what was a very boozy affair. One friend of ours, known for his lack of etiquette, brought a bottle of wine. Slightly odd, as no one was drinking wine, including him: he drank our beers (and ate our food) all night. This morning I realised that at the end of the night, he took his unopened bottle of wine back home with him. I am amazed: surely drink you present at a party becomes the property of the hosts, even if it doesn't get drunk? Or am I being a little harsh?

I'm not actually going to mention it to him, it's just that he's gone down further in my estimation.

Feel free to give opinions.

OP posts:

wickedfairy · 14/06/2010 08:35

I am Scottish (East coast) and have NEVER known anyone to take their alcohol home with them! How rude!

It gets left with the host (if there is any left!).

Very Strange.....

Harimo · 14/06/2010 08:36

haha! That is funny! That bottle of wine has probably been to more parties than I have!! haha!

thumbwitch · 14/06/2010 08:46

If I have taken a specific bottle of drink for me because of some peculiar requrement, I woudl drink that and that alone and take any undrunk home.

But if I brought a bottle and then drank other alcohol provided for me, I woudl leave the bottle.

If I brought a bottle of wine and was not offered any other alcohol and the wine was not opened - I might consider taking the bottle home again as well, depending on how hard it was to get hold of - but it would depend on a lot of other things too (such as food provision or whether a take away had been ordered and everyone had to pay their share).

IMoveTheStars · 14/06/2010 08:53

gah, I hate people who bring wine and then drink everybody elses beer. It's just because it's easier to carry it.

I'd have hidden it tbh

pigletmania · 14/06/2010 09:05

You certainly should not take drink home with you after a party, how rude, tight!!!!! When you give someting its a gift even if its not drunk, its nice to think that they might enjoy it another time.

BaresarkBunny · 14/06/2010 10:27

I held a dinner party a couple of weeks ago and not only did a friend take back the wine he had brought but a week later came round to get the half bottle of port he hadn't finished drinking. Now thats rude!

zipzap · 14/06/2010 15:34

Should you ever have a party again and invite him, make sure that, whatever he brings with him, you make a big fuss of taking from him when he arrives and saying that you'll open it straight away as you know it must be something really good if he wanted to take his last bottle away with him

all within earshot (and wine pouring distance) of lots of other people at the party of course.

And then watch at the end of the evening to see if he tries to take anything away with him this time...

thecatatemygymsuit · 14/06/2010 15:39

Just so rude, and Baresak Bunny, your friend is ruder still!

Eve4Walle · 14/06/2010 15:39

Ex-friends of ours used to do this sort of thing all the time. Once we had a BBQ and provided all the drink and food etc. They turned up with a pack of 6 burger buns as their 'contribution'. At the end of the evening, there were 2 left and they took them back home with them.

They also bought a half-drunk bottle of coke round to a dinner party we had once.

We don't see them now.

Greensleeves · 14/06/2010 15:42

I think MIL would do this

dh remembers crippling embarassment while eating out as a child - she would stuff all the bread rolls in her handbag at every meal

I might take a bottle of wine back with me if there was loads left and I hadn't been drinking much myself

Tenalady · 14/06/2010 15:46

OMG Florin, a whole case, blimey, I would of called the Police, and I don't care if he is a friend, brother,granny. That is despicable!

fustyarse · 14/06/2010 16:06

ok so we have established that this is not a Scottish thing.

your friend is just a tight fisted nob.

waitingforbedtime · 14/06/2010 16:13

Im Scottish and live in Scotland - no-one I know would do this!

YellowDaffodil · 14/06/2010 16:18

We have a friend like this always brings 4 cans and drinks twice that - then one day he came round and was called away almost as soon as he arrived and took his 4 cans with him. The arse.

DH discovered an out of date crate of beer in the shed (how that got missed in our house I will never know) and gave this friend cans out of that. Apparently he had a thumping hangover the next day. Childish but oddly satisfying.

YellowDaffodil · 14/06/2010 16:18

We have a friend like this always brings 4 cans and drinks twice that - then one day he came round and was called away almost as soon as he arrived and took his 4 cans with him. The arse.

YellowDaffodil · 14/06/2010 16:19

Sorry double post

BottleOfRum · 14/06/2010 16:19

This EXACT same thing happened to me at the weekend! Also hosted a party, spent £££ on food and pimms etc, and when everyone was drunkenly leaving, two of the ladies that were there (having drunk my pimms all night) were removing their bottles of wine from the fridge to take home with them. I was completely at some people's rudeness.

zerominuszero Your cheap friend obviously had no intention of drinking wine in the first place, and probably had always intended drinking your beer, but didnt want to look rude by turning up empty handed, so probably bought a bottle of wine that had been lying round his home since Christmas!

BuzzingNoise · 14/06/2010 16:23

yanbu. Some people have no manners.

babywalks · 14/06/2010 16:30

I'm Scottish but I really don't think its about nationality, imo it's more to do with how the booze was brought in iyswim.

For example if the guy handed the bottle of wine over to you as he came in the house, as in, 'here you go, thanks for having us round' then I would find it quite strange if he then took it back home at the end of the night.

But if he brought it with him to drink himself then it wouldn't be so weird. Although if he brought it to drink himself then he should have probably drank that first rather than got stuck into your beers.

We had a world cup party 4 years ago and each of DP's friends brought pretty much a case of beers each, and there was about 10-15 of them. Ended up having to fill our bath up with cold water to keep all the bottles and cans. When we chucked everybody out in the wee hours of the next morning most of them took what they could from the bath but then they were going onto another party plus what were me and DP supposed to do with about 50 bottles of beer?!! It didn't bother me in the slightest that they done this as they brought the beer in to drink themselves, it just so happens that they didn't drink them all while they were here.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 14/06/2010 16:32

Very rude,shows a distinct lack of class, but I would not worry about it. Just make sure when you visit is you get some really awful wine to take (and not drink) Or maybe some 29p cans of fosters lager...

turkeyboots · 14/06/2010 16:32

Yanbu. I agree some people have no manners. Once hosted party for some of DH friends, one of whom brought along some other people we didn't know. Had no objections to this til they were going home and despite having drunk my booze and eaten my food, asked for the bottle of coke and bag of crips they'd brought back! Was gobsmacked!

MrsC2010 · 14/06/2010 16:40

How rude! I can't believe people actually do this.

MintHumbug · 14/06/2010 16:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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