to wanna feel like me again

[Hai1988]

Hi all just need a little rant and time to let it out really as i cant to any of my rl "friends" i say that cus i dont really have any any more being that i am a 21 yo mum and all friends are working and going out drinking all the time.
I have tried to make new friends at ds nursery but i am not a very outgoing person and cant really start conversations and they all seem to be in the clique's already.
I am basicly a mother and home slave worker
I do not regret having my ds i love him to peace's i just want a little bit of thanks from dh and to have a life outside of these 4 walls and school runs.
Today i am just feeling a bit down and up and angry lots of mood swings really
I wanna talk to some1 rl about it but i dont know who or how to approach the situation.

Sorry i know this probably wont make any sense i just needed to vent other wise i think i might break down

Everyone needs someone to talk to and there is nothing wrong with wanting a bit of your own life.

Have you tried looking at groups at your local childrens centres? They do lots of mum and toddler/ baby groups and i have even seen some directed at younger mums. All the groups tend to be chatting and coffee or an activity and then time for chat and coffee after and are aimed to get mums together and make friends. Even if you are not very outgoing it should be easy to make friends as eveybody is usually in same position and majority are very friendly and sympathetic.

Have you noticed any mums on your street with similar age DC's? If so why not put a note through their door and ask if they fancy coffee sometime and leave your mobile number. I did this with a few mums near me and have made really lovely friend.

What about emailing some local mums on MN though the 'local' section as there are lots of mums saying they are new to area and would like a friend.

Good luck!

Hi thanks, i have tryed the mn local thing and my area isnt on there so i am guessing that know from my area is on here.

My ds is 4.9 so baby and toddler groups are a bit young for him now.
I could try the naighbour thing but i feel to embarrassed to do it

hello -know how you feel, and I am much older, but it feels strange "just" be mummy and housewife. Unlike you,my friends are too old have young kids! I try go out most days, go to a group: it's quite nerve racking beforehand, but usually feel better after a chat and a cup of tea. Also agree the suggestions above - neighbour's children can be v handy friends. And could you go gym,swimming,walk with ipod in when ds at nursery? Something you can do in peace and not about kids or housework?

Hi, so sorry you are feeling this way.

Did you used to have any hobbies or are you interested in anything in particular? while your DC is at nursery, maybe you could find a class or a group to join on your own, not related to your child and husband. It might help to give you a sense of a life in your own right, which you are entitled to (although i appreciate you feel not very outgoing.)

My DS is only 3 months and i have been going to a number of the baby groups there such as a breastfeeding group, baby massage group and also gone to a baby swim sessions at a local pool near me. Some groups are aimed at mums with young babies just like you. Some childrens centres do more groups than others so have a look at a few near you. Or, get the number of the centre off the internet and ring them up and ask what groups they do that would be suitable for you and your baby. You may have to go to a few to find one with people you get on with or have something in common with but it is definatly worth giving it a go and trying a few things out.

It may be worth mentioning where you live so someone looking at this thread who lives in the same area could suggest some suitable groups near you.

im in weymouth, dorset.
I will see about the groups but ds is far from a baby he is starting reception in sept, so will have more time on my own soon with nothing to do.

Hai1988,

I am in Dorchester and post most local things but not for Weymouth. Netmums seems to have a strong weymouth section/meetups.

There is a surestart centre in Weymouth, think its near the library.

Have you thought of going to an exercise class? I've heared good things about the Redlands centre. Or I know a very good salsa teacher who holds classes in Weymouth. You don't need a partner. here

Why not look into doing a course in Sept at Weymouth college.

I also have a ds starting reception in September but I am more than twice your age.

Apologies i had read 4.5 months not years.

tis ok monkey

Bless you, it can be so lonely sometimes. I work with young parents and many of them have reported similar things to you. All thier mates are out clubbing and socialising. Is there still time for that for you sometimes? Afterall you are still you not just Mummy.

Yes-I'm sure other people will agree. Don't be too despondent though, once kids are in school the time will fly past and you will wonder where it all went! I didn't feel like"myself" until DD was at least 5 or 6; she's 8 now and so much more independent with a life of her own. Also remember that you are still very young with plenty of time for socialising etc once children are older.

hi,can partner take dc and you go out with pals/get haircut/go pub. do make plans for you time get him watch the children

gym time,cinema for you,walk with ipod blasting

take care

thanks all, so glad you all understand how i feel. Think i might try and perswade hubby to look after little one and try and arrange a night out with some old friends

thanks all, so glad you all understand how i feel. Think i might try and perswade hubby to look after little one and try and arrange a night out with some old friends