to say that when DS has gone to bed DP isn't allowed to talk to me for ten minutes?

[Valpollicella]

So, I get home from work, do 'DS' stuff until betime. But when he's in bed, I neeeeed ten mins of no-one talking to me, asking me things etc. Can imagine it's exactly the same for SAHM's as well!

So just now when DP was wittering on (he knows my mn name, so if you read this, that was meant with lurve ) I told him to please stop talking as I felt like my head was about to explode as all I've had all day is people talking to me and asking me stuff

Those first 15 mins where they are asleep and your brain says....'Ahhh. Peace!' Utter bliss

YANBU - I find a glass of wines hits the spot

I knw what you mean, I need regular breaks through the day.
Luckily my Dh is workning nights tonights so I am having some peace and quiet.

oh yes so need that empty brain space to switch off for a wee while - although my time has been used up by DH muttering about his tv not working

shhhhhhh ....

I'm exactly like this... Sometimes I just have to say "stop talking, just all be quiet".

Even then, screaming eagle.

i knw exactly how you feeli sometimes need 5 mins just to commplete an entire thought in my head
didnt get thart tonight, ds awake until 9.20m, dd woke half an hour ago in between, been making chilli
need some time to relax & space out

Ah, so good to hear I'm not a selfish horrible person to say (in the nicest possible way)...'I need you to stop talking to me for ten minutes or so please?'

YANBU, everyone needs a bit of brain space. If DP ever says to me he needs alone time, I know it's code for 'Shut up, don't talk to me, let me be by myself for a while'. Same applies if I tell him I need alone time. Neither of us gets offended, we just get on with it.

Only 10 minutes? You are a saint!

Oh goodness, no, YANBU. I am a lone parent of teenagers and I too have to have some total peace before they go to bed or my head will explode. These days I often get that by escaping to walk the dogs alone, when I was young free and single I used to slouch off to my local after work and sit in the corner with a long drink and the Telegraph crossword for 10 minutes before I felt able to deal with any more communication.

I seriously recommend 10 minutes peace and quiet and a glass of wine (or adopting a dog and escaping!). You go for it!

hmmmm, i disagree... sorry.

if you guys need space though, you need it, so yanbu

i find dp talking is sooo different to dd continuously chattering though

I need physical space as well as silence.

All that clambering over me and breastfeeding - I just want to be quite quiet with no one touching me for a while.

I always come and have half an hour ten minutes MNing after I've settled DS to sleep. I tell DH its to stay upstairs to check he's gone off OK, but actually, its just to have some quiet me time.

No need to apologise MrsRhett!

I just find that spending all day with adults asking me stuff, and then coming home with then DP and DS talking to me, I neeeeed those precious minutes where not one person in the world is talking to me (other than MN'ers )

Totally agree, but only 10 minutes!?

YANBU I totally understand it.
It'snot because I don't love DH but I do need that little bit of time that is totally mine just to clear my head of the day take a few deep breaths and just enjoy the quiet.

A very dear friend of mine told me when on holiday with her hubby before their evening meal she informs him to not speak to her for an hour. She says being with him 24/7 means she needs 60 mins of quiet.

I normally go for a run or go to the allotment to get my half hour after the dc are in bed. Then some fecker goes and strikes up a conversation and ruins it

I did have a rant at dh at the weekend to the effect that I shouldn't have to leave the house to get a bit of peace.

totally agree, though dh gets upset about it approximately 3 times per week.... the same as when he gets home just as i'm in the midst of the 6.30pm hellish time of making supper/doing baths/helping with homework/breastfeeding baby/feeding cat etc, and he says 'tell me about your day', and then huffs off when i say i'm slightly distracted at moment darling...

There is a reason I have a magazine rack in the bathroom...

DH and I both value our space and peace so we are good at letting each other just go into the bedroom on our own for half an hour or so to decompress, even before DD goes to bed, especially if one of us has had a shit day at work or a tough day with DD. She talks non-stop so sometimes you just need silence for a bit.

potters round kitchen with glass of wine and eNORMous earplugs

And it's not just the being talked at, it's all the other noise surrounding small children - their squeaky-voiced cartoon shows, their low grade sibling bickering, their noisy up-and-down-stairs-ness, the washing machine going constantly...

Hubby can't understand why I don't have the radio or music on during the day whilst home alone. Because then it wouldn't be totally siiiiiiilent.

This summer I've got two weeks of visiting families, complete with their various small children, and only one day inbetween to clean, strip the beds, etc. By Day 8 or 9, I'm going to be in a cupboard somewhere, humming to myself and gently rocking...