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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not let my 3yr go on a school trip?

37 replies

VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 18:44

with the nursery school, because the coach/bus has adults seat belts and he is too small for an adult seat belt and they wont be providing proper car seats or booster seats?

and they will be on the bus most of the day, as its a trip to the Safari park

OP posts:
MmeTrueBlueberry · 08/06/2010 18:45

Why don't you provide a car seat? The parents of little children at our school always provide the seats.

Pozzled · 08/06/2010 18:46

Can you provide a seat for him? If not, then YANBU.

DilysPrice · 08/06/2010 18:47

I'm normally pretty gung ho about these things, but I'd say no to this one - short local journey in city at 15 mph is one thing, serious motorway trip is another.
I saw an accident report from a similar situation and it's really affected my views.

Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 18:48

my car seat is isofix and weighs a ton, it would mean the private nursery that i drop him off at in the morning, would have to carry the thing down the road to the school

i cant drop it at school at i leave for work at 7.30am

OP posts:
violethill · 08/06/2010 18:50

I would imagine they will be quite happy to carry the seat for you as a one-off if it means your child would otherwise miss the trip.

It can't literally weigh a ton! Slight inconvenience is all.

Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 18:53

How are they going to carry it though? they are talking 5 or 6 children to school (small children, 3 & 4 yr olds) who will hold my childs hand crossing the road while the nursery staff is carrying a car seat?

OP posts:
Tortington · 08/06/2010 18:54

drop it off at the school beforehand.

borderslass · 08/06/2010 18:55

could you not borrow a booster seat they dont weigh a lot.

scurryfunge · 08/06/2010 18:55

Borrow a light weight one just for the day

violethill · 08/06/2010 18:58

If they are taking 5 or 6 children to school, I should think they will have 5 or 6 car seats, as everyone will be in the same situation! I expect someone from the nursery will drive down to the school with the seats. That's what I would do.

MumNWLondon · 08/06/2010 19:02

If you are worried about him being on a bus all day and being bored then YANBU. Not sure safari park and sitting on a bus all day good idea for 3 year old.

If you are worried about the car seat I think YAB a little U. By three can use very lightweight booster seat which they could probably leave on bus.

I went with my DDs nursery when she was 4 (half the kids still 3) to the zoo (half an hour not on motorway). The adult / kid ratio was 1:2 so I held DD's hand plus I had nominated other child to look after. There were 30 kids, 4 teachers and 11 parent helpers.

None of the kids brought booster seats, I strapped them in with the adult seatbelts which seemed fine for 3 and 4 year olds.

Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 19:10

i dont have a booster seat, i dont know anyone who can lend me one and i cant afford to buy one

OP posts:
Hulababy · 08/06/2010 19:13

Is he big enough for just a booster cushion - they can be as cheap as £5-10.

runnybottom · 08/06/2010 19:14

Do you never bring him anywhere on a bus? They don't have car seats on them.

EveWasFramed10 · 08/06/2010 19:15

You clearly don't want DC to go VT...or you wouldn't be throwing this barrier about the seat up over and over. Don't send him. Keep him home, or find out what's happening with any of the other kids who aren't going.

Simples.

Rosa · 08/06/2010 19:16

BUs goes 1st to nursery to load car seats / children then proceeds to nearby school???

Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 20:12

nope never been on a bus with him

the car seat isnt a barrier, its a fucking heavy piece of shit and i wouldnt expect anyone to have to carry it, i can barely carry it myself

Rosa, thankyou, first sensible suggestion, why didnt i think of that, i will ask the school if they can do that

OP posts:
Hulababy · 08/06/2010 20:16

I agree that an Isofix seat is much heavier than a standard car seat - not feasible to carry vey far at all, esp with lots of children in tow.

IMoveTheStars · 08/06/2010 20:21

VT - I have an isofix seat too (priorifix), and I can just about lift it from the front door to the car (all of 10 feet).. no, it doesn't weigh a ton (obviously) but it weighs too much for me to carry it.

I wouldn't let DS (2.7) go on a trip like this without me anyway... call PFB if you like, but VT- YANBU.
I also wouldn't put DS in a booster seat, he's far too little (and he's tall for his age).

Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 20:22

Hula yes it is very heavy, i cant wait to get rid, by my ds2 is very small for a 3 yr old and still needs it

i do think the school shouldnt be allowing 3yrs on a bus with adults seat belts, and no boosters, i think that has mildly annoyed me, they didnt even suggest i bring my own car seat/booster when i enquired, they come across as not really giving a shit tbh

ho hum

OP posts:
Original poster
VinegarTits · 08/06/2010 20:24

mine is priorifix too Jareth, I need a few cans of spinach before i lift it

OP posts:
Iggisfulloftayto · 08/06/2010 20:27

Are the coach seats lapbelts? I'm assuming they are? Though a very modern one might be 3-point. It would make a big difference as to whether car seats would fit with them.

Lapbelts are more adjustable for small/large people, though they have their own safety issues. I'm thinking of aeroplanes, where a small child just gets their own seat with the lapbelt.
I don't think you are BU, but maybe that's because I'm exactly the same when it comes to road safety, ie paranoid! Or careful, depending on your perspective
There's some coach safety advice here

TotallyWipedout · 08/06/2010 20:29

I wouldn't have had neglected second child DD going on such a trip aged 3, never mind my PFB. Far too worrying all round. I'd rather have had her at home for a day. I can take her to a safari park myself.

frogetyfrog · 08/06/2010 20:33

I wouldnt let my dd who is 5 go on a booster seat without a high back anyway. When we recently got her measured in Mothercare we were told she still needed highback booster and the impression I got was that it was a legal requirement? I presume there must be other rules for buses.

But I wouldnt be letting my children go on a trip without me prior to school age anyway. Even in reception at school, I would be hesitant.

SweetGrapes · 08/06/2010 21:03

They're about 10 kilos usually. Not a one hand job with a little one holding onto the other hand.
Doesn't the school have any? At the primary section maybe? Dd's primary always had a bunch of booster seats. The nursery section borrow them now and again.
Agree 3 yr old is too little for motorway trip with no child seats.