to think if this isn't illegal its really really stupid and a the very least just plain wrong?!

[Ladyanonymous]

Sorry this is FB related so hide now if you hate FB.

I have a friend who goes into really intimate detail about her current custody battle with her ex over their two daughters.

I am aware I can hide her but is it just me or is this just really stupid, wrong, bad for everyone concernced and should not be aired in public?

I myself am in the middle of a nasty divorce but would never once mention this in a public forum such as a socail networking site.

Surely all her ex has to do is get hold of it, print it and all her mates comments out and use it against her?

I was going to politely say something but I wonder is it any of my business....

Sorry...should have said on her status updates, which turns into s thread which all her mates join in on in slagging him off....doh!

Sorry...should have said on her status updates, which turns into s thread which all her mates join in on in slagging him off....doh!

its odd how some peope reveal every personal detail about their private lives.
I think it is in very bad taste especially where kids are concerned

If she's a friend, I would mention it, for her own sake, on the exact grounds that you state. Her ex could indeed try to use the information against her. What do they say... forewarned is forearmed? Why give him the ammunition?

If I were in your friend's position I wouldn't think that it's none of your business, I'd be grateful for the advice. You can but mention it politely in passing. If she appears offended or won't take your advice, at least you've tried to help her.

its very stupid and immature of her, but its her FB so she can do what she likes you could politely comment i guess, something like 'not being funny, but if he showed this thread in court, would it affect your case?'

If this is a friend, rather than an aquataince, then yes, I think you should say something.
If she is stressed and going through a custody case, she may not have considered the scenario you lay-out. She maybe using FB to vent.
All you need say, is something like, I wouldnt want your ex to see this and use it as possible ammunition against you. She may or may not stop on FB, but at least you have made her aware of possible consequences.

yanbu. I don't understand why people don't keep their mouths zipped shut over things like this. It's so innapropriate.

XP and his twatty best mate slagged me off to high heaven on FB when we split last year. I kept the moral high ground by never mentioning it once.

Hi, stuff like this can be brought into Court, but Judges don't look very kindly on the person bringing it (just from experiences of friends with ex's who've tried this). However from the point of view of the children, it's really better not to air your laundry so publicly.

Having said that I can see how it's tempting for her and many's the time I've felt like a right old vent about my ex - haven't done it though as I don't ever want littlemad to read things like that about his father, he might be a dreadful ex-husband but littlemad has a right to have his own relationship with his father, not one that I've influenced by my feelings not about him as a father but as an ex-husband. Hope that makes sense.

YANBU, people write truely ridiculous things on their status.

My cousin wrote once asking any of his mates to come with him to beat up some bloke (no idea why). He had idiotic mates agreeing to go with him. I pointed out this was all the police would need to see exactly who had done it. It never did happen though. Some people are really thick tbh.

As it is a friend, I would say something.

yabu

people will choose to use whatever medium they have to hand to spend gossip or lurid tales of woe from their perspective if that is their natural leaning

also the opinion of someone's friends, no matter how distressing for the subject, cannot be used against you (unless they are threatening to kill him)

i abhor fb but don't think it is to blame in this case

isnt family court supposed to be confidential? i'd have a word,but suspect she wont take it well

Depends what is being said. Threatening, vile, nasty status updates can be used in court. I have seen it happen to a good friend who naively was venting whilst feeling very isolated during a residency dispute. It did her case a lot of harm.