to think my midwife is unreasonable???

[perfectishmum]

I have five children and DC6 is on the way. I gave birth to all except DD1 without any pain relief (DD1 was breach).
The other day I told the midwife that I intend on having this child naturally. She said "ok, nothing but gas and air". I told her i didn't want it and she just sort of gave me a look.
AIBU to think that if I've done this four times before that I can do it again.
And is my midwife BU to assume?

If you're not having it in the woods at full moon it's not natural.

I had VBAC and no drugs, didn't like the G&A. It all went fine, but I'm not having any more dcs.

they don't even have g&a in Belgium; I had all three of mine without drugs.

'natural' birth in the UK does tend to mean just g&a.

LOL, I had exactly the same experience at booking in. Was asked about first birth, said it was fine, used hypnobirthing and didn't need anything else (not tough, it really didn't hurt) and she wrote down Gas and Air.

V. strange.

I could see using the G&A as pissing me off actually, would have hated something in my mouth, I don't like to eat or drink when in labour, just like to be left alone, no talking or touching.

I did ask about recreational pethidine use though, but they said no.

I dont think she is U she just seems to have misunderstood, you put her right on what you meant,whats the problem? she didnt say anything rude did she just a "look"

I liked gas and air for a while, but like Morloth, it started to annoy me when I was at the pushing stage...I just wanted it quiet and to be left alone.

YANBU...midwife really did probably just assume that gas and air are 'normal' for a natural childbirth...don't think she meant anything by it.

Congrats on DC6, too...what a lovely big family you have!!

I think you've over thought this a bit OP. Midwife said G&A? - which most women do use so it's hardly out of left field for her to assume and you said no and she said ok. Exactly what is your problem with this - she looked at you oddly? Come on - a look is open to a thousand interpretations and unless we know how you spoke to her we can't possibly decide what was going on. It could be that you snapped 'NO' and she was just looking at you praying she didn't have to deal with you in labour......
Good luck with the birth.

oh get over it! good luck with birth tho

so glad I am not in belgium or NL!!! drug free my arse

Have the gas and air there just in case and if you don't need it don't use it.

I am All for making life less complicated.

YABU. I imagine that as far as this MW is concerned, G&A doesn't make birth unnatural, just a bit less painful. So asking for a "natural" birth wouldn't preclude G&A, basically.

You are over thinking this.

YANBU

Twas reading an article today about a midwife's work in 1930's Britain. Hardly any of the 372 women she is recorded as having delivered had pain relief in labour ( and if they did it would have been morphine, a bit of gas and air or ether) and all the rest gave birth without, almost all at home. None of the women died (though one was given a CS - at home! eek! Presume she also had pain relief..... swoon.....!). Apparently pain relief consisted of 'cups of tea' and the midwife saying "go on, we'll go on another little bit and it'll be alright!"

Obviously now we've got access to epidurals, c/s and the wonders of modern medicine we're vastly less frightened of childbirth and traumatised by it. Aren't we?

Must have been lovely having the midwife coming to your house on her bike throughout your pregnancy. The midwife said "The women got confident and they got to trust in me, and they used to show me all the knitted things that they were making and we'd get really pally. I loved it". So different from today.

giveittomebaby - remind me - what was the mortality rate for mothers and babies back in the 30's? It wasn't all cups of tea back then you know!

"we're vastly less frightened of childbirth and traumatised by it. Aren't we?"

Women today might still be afraid, but I doubt they fear childbirth as much as their grandmothers and great grandmothers did.

She is BU if she's not listening to you.

Gas and air makes me want to hurl.

YANBU, thugh i got that kind of thing from MW who saw me about DD1..a bit unusual when it is your umpteenth baby and you know exactly what to expect.

Who gives a toss what that midwife thinks?

When you are in labour you won't ask for it.... (I love G&A!!!)

Midwifes make assumptions based on the masses: I didn't get a water birth in DC3 because midwife didn't believe I was in labour as I was so calm and composed - by the time she realised (me saying he's coming out) too late to fill pool.