Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

..to want more "free time" for myself , just myself?

67 replies

bosmobi · 02/06/2010 21:08

I read in an American newspaper recently that women have "at least 30 hours of leisure every week". According to Prof John Robinson of the University of Maryland, who is supposedly widely-known as the father of time-use studies, "women have more leisure now than they did in the 1960s, even though more women are working outside the home." It made me feel deeply depressed - I've been counting and I'm not getting anywhere near my 30 hour quota . In fact, I can't imagine what I would do with 30 hours - it just seems so implausible (and rather frightening, as I might have time for intraspection and other scary things like that). Does anybody out there get anywhere near to 30 hours of free time or is Prof Robinson just plain wrong?

OP posts:
naughtymummy · 03/06/2010 08:15

Must depend on definition of leisure. I find hanging out with the Dc s much more relaxing than cleaning the house or going round the supermarket- I think the idea that sahms have all the time their dcs are at school off, is very strange. On my days off I can get about an hour while they are at school. Holidays are much more relaxing, even if I have both all day

mumbar · 03/06/2010 14:07

Oh off the point but belle I justed wanted to say Hi as I'm too a single mum and work full time while doing an OU degree

what you studying??

Sorry bit of a hijack

Manda25 · 03/06/2010 15:15

Oh god i just remembered what it is like to have young kids!!...it gets so much easier.

I work full time and my youngest (aged 7.5) is in bed by 7pm - all housework done by 7pm. Go to bed at 11-12ish (28-35 hours per week) then as much time as i want really over a weekend - usually a couple of hours in the afternoon and if i go out another 7 hours or so.... even when i am with youngest he is a delight to be with.

TBH all my time feels like me time because i only have one child (other one is 19) who is great to be around and doesnt demand much from me

BelleDameSansMerci · 03/06/2010 17:49

Hi mumbar, I've just finished the AA100 Arts Foundation Course to enable me to start a BA in English Language and Literature. That'll be really useful in my job selling communications solutions then!! I actually started the OU course as something just for myself. I've found it really, really hard to keep up and have only done the reading necessary to complete the course

How about you?

mumbar · 03/06/2010 20:16

Did DD100 intro to social sciences then this year E100 early years practice certificate. I'm doing the open degree (and doing maths and education) as I want to do my teacher training. I find I only get time to do the essentials too. Just waiting the results of my final essay as I passed the first bit of E100.

BelleDameSansMerci · 03/06/2010 20:35

Me too! Final submission last Friday and have to get 40% to pass (have passed the rest). I think, though, that you have to fluff up quite badly to fail the intro. Not that I couldn't manage to do that... I forgot I needed to submit it until four days before it was due. Another rush job then!

Hope your result is a good one... Really admire the vocation to teach.

mumbar · 03/06/2010 20:41

i'm an lsa now in a special school so just career progression. IYSWIM

Need 40% to pass too and 15% gives a re submission chance. Think I'll be shocked if I get less than 15% - actually that in itself would almot be an acheivement!!!

Quite enjoying the free evenings at the mo without 2/3 hours of study.

best of luck with yours let me know how you get on.

ZZZenAgain · 03/06/2010 20:42

I don't feel like I get 30 hours of leisure a week

nowhere near it

BelleDameSansMerci · 03/06/2010 20:43

And you... Nice to feel I'm not the only one.

mumbar · 03/06/2010 20:56

I know Belle I'll be searching you out for sympathy when it all gets too much next somester and you can do the same to me

chefswife · 03/06/2010 21:30

Me time is time that I do not have to think about any family responsibilities. Although its 9pm and DD is asleep, I'm still on call and can't really relax or enjoy it. I'm usually finishing the last of folding laundry or unloading dishwasher, or scrubbing the floor at that time of the night too, so really, not that leisure.

Um.. not sure about the 'some do art' comment. As a professional working artist (sculptor) with gallery representation in London, I take offense. Its not work I can do around LO's either, so its not like I'm hacking out some thought deprived, abstract, cheap acrylic paintings.

Scottishmummy Really, a SAHM is not work. I bust my ass to give my 18th month old DD the best experiences and try to do most of my domestica stuff while she sleeps so I can maximize my time with her. That said though, my sister has a 11 and 9 year old, her and DP collect disability welfare because he is illiterate, (ya, in Canada, you can get welfare if you can't read,,, don't make them learn or anything, ) and when I ask her what she does all day, she goes on about all the housework and such... bullshit. So, for her, being a SAHM is great. I hope you meant when the LO's are in school full time and mom has no other obligations.

I'd like to read this guys full study and see what he is actually referring to. It might have to do with all the appliances and such we can use to make our lives easier. All I know is that I berated against getting a dishwasher for years, but when I finally got one, I can't believe I've wasted so much time washing farking dishes.

silverflower · 03/06/2010 21:52

LOL at 30hrs of me time! I don't rack that up in a year!

Full time work 8-6 for 5 days a week. Dinner/bath/bed/homework for 3DCs til about 8.30 at least. then my own marking etc til about 10.30. Clear up kitchen, put on washing, have own quick bath then bed. At weekends DH works so have DCs all the time for football swimming etc. (All very lovely but not me time).

Have been out twice by myself in last year - max of two hours each time.

Basically have decided that me time isn't going to happen for some years yet....

vicbar · 04/06/2010 00:07

Well I work 21 hours a week so theres the majority of my 'leisure time' if yuo add in the hours walk 3 x a week and waiting at swimmming / footy etc Im weel over the 30 hours .
Seriously tough I want to go into town on my own to get the final bits for my hospital bag buy 3 x birthday pressies and some baby bits and DH says what do you need to do!!!!!! I could have hit him, I only want 2 hours, he plays evening eague cricket every week (at least 3 hours) and Saturday cricket (at least 4 hours) and will go on at least one long bike ride a week and I have the audacity to want to shop on my own with my 3 DC whilst 33 wks gone in really hot temps.
Wh at a selfish bitch..
rant over I might be able to sleep now Ive gotten that out of my system.

chefswife · 04/06/2010 01:56

lol vicbar Hope you got to sleep.

foreverastudent · 04/06/2010 04:37

I dont think 'leisure time' when the DCs are in bed counts unless you are doing things you would do as leisure even if you didn't have to stay in 'babysitting'.

Pre-DCs I was out of the house 5 nights a week and if I didnt have to stay in with them that is how I would choose to spend my leisure time. So is it really 'leisure' to keep yourself occupied (mn/tv/dvd) when you dont have a free choice over how that time is spent? For me it is only 'leisure' when Icangetdrunk the kids are away .

I would count a family trip to a theme park etc as leisure, though.

Fibilou · 04/06/2010 04:38

30 hours of leisure ? Are they counting sleep as leisure or something ?

LC200 · 04/06/2010 07:11

I have a dd in yr 1 and a ds at pre-school from 9-3 3 days per week. It is lovely but not really "me time" as I am either cleaning or volunteering at school and as a bfc. Once a month or so I am a lady what lunches with a friend in a similar position, and once a week I go out for a walk/run. But it's certainly not the life of leisure I'd envisaged!

Having said that, I have an interview on Mon for a full-time teaching job (I last worked as a full-time teacher 6 years ago). I think it might come as a rude shock if I get it, and find my leisure time slashed massively! I will be getting a cleaner however...

New posts on this thread. Refresh page