AIBU to not care about sex of baby????

[clpsmum]

AIBU to get more than a little annoyed with people assuming that i have fallen pregnant again specifically for the pupose of having a little boy???? I am currently 20 wks pregnant and have 2 beautiful little boys and would love another little boy am sick and tired of people telling me they will keep their fingers crossed i have a little girl. I wouldn't swap my boys for a million girls and would much rather people kept their fingers crossed i had a healthy baby regardless of the sex. I don't even particularly want a girl. if i have a healthy baby i will be thrilled regardless of its sex.
How do i tell people this without buting their head off/offending them/sounding neurotic!!!???

I did tell one friend of MIL's that I was hoping for a kitten but if I got a baby then I'd just have to make the best of it....am v ashamed now of course

Yes, it is just conversation but... I just don't understand why people would assume you want one of each. Why assume you'd want daughters after sons??? I didn't-though I ended up with two and I love them dearly and I'm grateful all 3 are healthy. I'll always feel a little pang at not getting my brood of boys.

YANBU. So annoying!

If you have only one sort, people assume you want the other sort. If you have one of each, people ask why you would want another seeing as you've already got both sorts. You can't escape!

Of course YANBU. But there's not really much you can to do about it. Let it slide. They're just being well-meaning but daft twits, who don't realise how irritating these comments are.

OTOH you could alwys answer something outrageously ridiculous like "I'm hoping for a penguin this time."

A friend of a friend had a boy, then 10 months later another boy. They decided to 'try for the girl' and sure enough they got pregnant again pretty quickly.... with boy triplets - when the triplets where born they had 5 under 2. I've always thought that is the lesson of 'trying for a girl/boy'...

We're just pregnant with #2 - don't know the sex - there are pro's and con's of each... another DS and it'll be cheaper as we obviously have lots of boy clothes, and we know what we're doing.... if #2 is a girl I'm sure we'll love it just as much - although she might have to wear lots of Thomas the Tank engine clothes....!

Perhaps the 'answer' to the question is something like 'we'll love it whatever it is'...

Of course, with everything baby/parent-related, you'll get judged whatever you do or say. If you say you just want a healthy baby and don't care about the sex - well then, you're smug.

YOu just wait, knitterthetwitter - it's harder than you think to dress your gorgeous baby girl head-to-toe in boys stuff.

I was SURE I'd do it (only 14 Months between my two)... but DDis most usually head to toe in pink!!

It's just idle small talk - people outside of immediate family and friends really don't give a shit.
I do think there is a bit of a taboo about talking about what you'd really like though. In my opinion, it's OK to admit you have a preference before they are born. I really wanted a boy when I was pregnant for first time last year, DD was born in Feb and I couldn't be more pleased with her, the thought of her being a boy seems incongrous now. Strange, really.

I think the worst thing is that people do know that you will love the baby just as much either way but still assume you want a girl/boy mix. Not everyone does and I say that as a mother of both.

I do see it all the time towards mothers of boys. Somehow if you have girls and say you don't mind, people believe you but if you have boys it is always assumed that you secretly want a girl.

Tbh, Its just conversation - no-one else really cares about your baby / what you're having, they're just being polite, and judging by the number of threads on here, it seems that you can't ask anything of pregnant women sometimes .

You have some women who get huffy if you ask them if they have a preference for gender, others who get huffy if you ask them if they have any names planned, some women get huffy if you ask them if they've been sick and the list goes on and on and on....

Sometimes I wonder whether it would be easier if everyone just ignored pregnant women and didn't ask them anything about their pregnancies, because it really does seem that you can't ask any questions without offending someone or another.

I've given up making polite conversations with pregnant women, but probably I'm in the wrong for not showing an interest

I think it's one of those 'stock' conversations that people have with pregnant women. I don't think they're trying to be offensive, maybe they could word it better at times though.

I think it's hard to know what to say to a pregnant woman beyond the normal, when are you due/what are you having/thought of any names/how is the bump sort of thing?