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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be utterly selfish and uncharitable.

5 replies

Vallhala · 30/05/2010 22:56

I help a small charitable organisation when I can. Although I'm normally only able to spend the odd day helping them out, last weekend my DDs and I stayed with them for 4 day. Much of the work is physical and can be demanding and by the time I came home I was knackered! Problem is, I've kind of said I will stay over and help this week too, if I'm able to find a few consecutive days by working around the charity's commitments as well as my own, but I now realise that I really don't want to.

This week will be the first time in ages that I have a break from my DDs (lone mum, girls are going to stay at Grandparents') which should actually be a break. On other occasions when they have gone to Grandma's I've been decorating/preparing to move house/ill etc. Last summer hols whilst they were away for 7 days I spent the week working for the charity, staying in a caravan with no running hot water and mosquitoes galore!

It's not that I don't love being there (apart from the mozzies!), it's just that I desperately need some 'me' time, something I've had very little of over the past 13 years of life as a divorced mum. I'm a poor sleeper at the best of times and am exhausted, with a very challenging DD2, so the thought of a few days totally to myself, to sleep when I like, go where I like as do as I please is bliss. I fear that the charity's owner will take it as a personal slight if I bale out as he and I are good friends and he always makes it clear how he values my contribution and how much (as is true) they rely on their volunteers but I still feel the need to recharge my batteries and take time to just 'stop and smell the flowers'.
AIBU not to go?

OP posts:
Tiredmumno1 · 30/05/2010 23:00

yanbu have some you time, sounds like you need it.

KarmaAngel · 30/05/2010 23:00

YANBU have your break and time to yourself.

scoobydoolady · 30/05/2010 23:01

Nope.

Everyone needs time out. If you don't, you will end up resenting the great work that you do.

Explain to the owner exactly how you feel and don't feel guilty about your decision.

You have a right to be you, enjoy smelling the flowers and you'll feel completely re-energised to carry on with the fab work you do.

larks35 · 30/05/2010 23:02

of course yanbu. Give yourself a break.

Vallhala · 30/05/2010 23:08

Thanks ladies, I was feeling unusually insecure and indecisive. I do love what I do to bits and I was worried that my desire to just, well sleeeeeeep, would be viewed by every except me as bloody selfishness. I'll have more confidence in politely explaining why I'm ducking out now.

OP posts:
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