Security Blanket - Is This Actually A Problem

[ToodleyBops]

I've name changed as I'm very embarrassed.

I'm quite old - old enough to be married with some children.

I have to carry a piece of my childhood security blanket with me at all times. I rub it between my fingers, generally in my pocket.

My Dh knows about this and has done all our relationship, and my children accept this as the norm. This has been the case my absolute entire life - I started it when I was tiny.

Its been there as a habit/obsession my entire life, through relationships, university, school, holidays etc etc. My mum decided very early in my life it was a battle she wasn't going to fight.

i KNOW its not normal or usual, but I "need" this. But I've never mentioned it to anyone medical. Is it actually okay to carry on like this (it causes me no distress unless its lost/can't be found etc) or should I be doing something about getting rid, even though it makes me calm/happy/helps me relax

One of mine has a security object (just to be obscure!). I think it'll be a long time before they'll want to give it up.

Where's the harm in it?

Well it's better thanbeing addicted to fags beer and drugs

I wouldn't worry

Thanks Werewolf - I guess in 99.9% of my thinking about it thats my theory - there is no harm, its an addiction for me thats not actually in any way harmful...

But I know its not really normal fora 30+ year old to need a security blanket to rub..

YANBU. I still sleep with a teddy - not my childhood teddy, but I need a teddy otherwise I can't get to sleep easily (I will eventually drop off, but struggle).

Have you considered, if it does get lost (or finally wears out), how you will get by? You may need to buy a piece of similar fabric which you have alongside the original for now, so it could conceivably be a stand-in if needed?

Hi Galena

I have a supply...because its constantly being rubbed it does wear out, so I go to the source and cut off another piece - I have moved to stand in fabric now as the original is too fragile, so I guess its jsut a bit of silky maternial now really rather than the actual blanket that it was originally...

I'm sure there are more than you think. I was talking about thumb sucking in DCs the other day, and a couple of people admitted they still suck their thumbs ...

Your security object is just like worry beads or a worry doll.
Nothing to worry about

There's nothing wrong with it, imo. You don't feel the need to take out the blanket in public, it's not affecting your life by the sounds of it. But I may be biased because I still have my comfort blanket too. I don't carry it around with me, but I would be horribly upset if it ever got lost. I just like to know I still have it, IYSWIM.

I've namechanged too, because it is an embarassing thing to admit, but as long as it's not causing any actual problems I'm keeping mine, and so should you.

I do this with a piece of ribbon, though I don't take it out with me, I do take it on holiday and had it in hospital recently.
One of the nurses threw it in the bin and I buzzed her to come back and get it out (couldn't get out of bed myself).
I sleep with a teddy too though not when my BF is here.
I don't see a problem with it.

I was going to ask you what you would do if you lost it, but as clearly any bit of silky material will do I guess that doesn't matter. It may not be 'normal', but everyone has some sort of quirk about them. Don't worry about it!!!

Does it bother you that you still need it?

Have you ever attempted, or even just considered any sort of "weaning" strategy? Eg keeping it in your coat pocket but leaving your coat on the back of your chair. Or keeping it in your handbag maybe.

I have a perfectly intelligent, confident, mature friend who still sucks her thumb while watching telly by the way.

I still suck my thumb and twiddle my hair into knots if I'm tired. I'm 39.

I still sleep with my ted (the original) every night (although I am careful to avert his one remaining eye if there is any naughtiness going on!)

Find it odd to go to sleep without him, but do go on holiday without him, as I have a horrible nightmare of airport security refusing to believe that a 37 yo woman needs a battered old bear, and ripping him apart to search for illegal contraband in his innards- the thought terrifies me

I am outwardly(!) normal, and I don't think it affects me in any huge way, so I don't see it as a problem

"although I am careful to avert his one remaining eye if there is any naughtiness going on!"

Have also namechanged as I'm embarassed... I'm sitting in bed rubbing an old cotton shirt between my fingers ...I've had a security blanket as long as I can remember, although I don't take it out with me. I know my mum kept trying to wean me off it (have memories of it not coming back from the wash), but I always found a substitute.

Am I embarrassed by it? Well, yes...it's not something I'd bring up in conversation. But I don't think it's a problem, and I don't think you should either.

I could probably cope without it - tend to only have it at night or if I'm very tired/stressed/emotional. But it relaxes me, calms me and is a thoroughly ingrained part of going to sleep for me.

Am 31 btw and have a 21mo DS...

skidoodly- I know he is the same age as me, but he is just such an innocent!

Jooly - I think that is very respectful of both ted and your DH

( DH has two eyes, though, so I wait until he is asleep before giving my ted his cuddles !)