To be really annoyed with my family

[slushy06]

My dad lives abroad and this is only the second time he has been over to see ds who is 4 and the first time he has seen dd 9mnths.

He is only able to come over for 6 days and he has been here since Friday I have seen him once for a hour on Saturday I will see him for another hour today and another hour Tuesday he flies back Wednesday.

Because his family have completely booked him up all day everyday. Even when he did come on Saturday he was here 1 hour before his brother called to ask him to pick up his wife from hospital(Which I am sympathetic for) but feel it was selfish of his brother to book him everyday and on the one day he come to see his gc calling him to run errands.

My dad is from a culture where he is not allowed to turn down his elder siblings requests and felt he couldn't turn down his request to pick his SIL from the hospital anyway. Now he is going to go back and my dc have hardly seen him . AIBU to think his family is being selfish.

yanbu but i did the same thing with my dad when he came over, it was the first time he had met dd so i kept him all to myself its hard to see other peoples feelings when you miss someone and are excited about seeing them

I get that but surely the point your dad came over was so like mine he could see your dd.

why dont you phone your uncle and say Actually this is hurting me i would love for my father to have some time with me and my children and you are monopolising him, may be your uncle simply hasnt thought about it and thinks he is doing your father a favour to do all these things for him

I don't have my uncles phone number and my dad would be mortified if I did this because of my fathers family's cultural belief's. He is going to come back over and not tell them he is over till the end of the week.

They did this last time too.

Is he staying with you?
If so then tbh I think he is being quite rude, culture or not.

And since he lives abroad, how do his relatives cope when he is not here?

The family are being rude, but I also think if your Dad lives in another country usually, he should be saying no!

No he is staying in a hotel. I have offered to put him up but he does not want to put me out.

Most of his family live abroad it is only his brother who lives in the same country as me.

He should say no, but that is why I don't have my uncles phone number for not respecting cultural differences and I think he is afraid of that happening to him to.

OK-perhaps he shouldn´t just say no, but try to reach a compromise?

The problem is that your uncle is really taking advantage imo.

If your father is at a hotel-how is your uncle getting in touch?

It´s awful of him to think he is more important than you & your children.

My dad owns his own buisness so takes his mobile phone everywhere. I am wondering if it is a bit of a contest in his eyes because as I said I have been excluded from my family, so maybe for all I know they push my dad to exclude me also.

He does not speak to me about my family at all so I don't know what is happening I havn't spoke to them since I was 13.

Ah yes-I thought it might be a mobile.
Can your Dad not switch off when with you or screen calls somehow?
I don´t have one so don´t know how possible that is

He can ignore the calls but needs to keep it on for work I may suggest that when he eventually gets here from his brothers. Thanks.