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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Re. children not in car seats?

47 replies

bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 16:34

When I was walking home from school today I saw a grandma driving off with three small children in the back of her car without seatbelts on. The youngest was in a Stage 2 car seat without the straps done up.

AIBU to put this note on the windscreen next time I see the car

"Yesterday I saw this car being driven away with the three children in the back not wearing seats belts. I have taken a note of your number plate and if I ever witness this happening again I will have no hesitation in ringing the police."

OP posts:
porcamiseria · 20/05/2010 16:41

a for gods sake stop being such a busybody!

what is it with everyone today!!!!

EndangeredSpecies · 20/05/2010 16:42

It's awfully harsh. Saying something would be perfectly reasonable, leaving a note like that to my mind is too Big Brother.

Original poster
bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 16:42

I take it you are a YABU then porca!

OP posts:
porcamiseria · 20/05/2010 16:43

yes!!!!

Oblomov · 20/05/2010 16:44

YABU. Your note is ott. Not that I am saying it is o.k. but just give this some thought first. i have driven my sons to school both with no seat belts on before. don't know how i didn't notice. not good. but ......wouldn't want to be reported to police.

Original poster
bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 16:44

Just checking porcy .

OP posts:
IHeartKittensAndWine · 20/05/2010 16:48

Absolutely not a note. It will only wind her up - however well intentioned that's the sort of thing that makes people see red and really disincentivises them to change behaviour

tattycoram · 20/05/2010 16:49

Actually I would write a note, but might tone it down a bit

MadamDeathstare · 20/05/2010 16:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

zapostrophe · 20/05/2010 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

porcamiseria · 20/05/2010 16:53

god dont you lot ever go to where my DP is from!!! babies in arms in cars galore...

I dont approve, and have fedexed a car seat there BTW.....

Original poster
bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 16:56

No, I don't know her at all.

Although we shouldn't make judgements about people, I'm afraid she looks like the type of person who wouldn't hesitate to give me a mouthful of abuse in if I were to helpfully point out her dgc were not strapped in, and I don't want to risk that as I walk my 6 and 9 year olds to and from school.

How could I tone down the note?

Or perhaps I should wait and see if she does it again?

The children were about 5, 4 and 2 ffs!

OP posts:
smallones · 20/05/2010 16:57

Our local council did a promotion (if you can call it that?) on car safety and seat belts. They went round all the playgroups and primary schools showing the children (with dolls, not real footage!) of what happened when children or adults didn't wear seatbelts.

The man that came to talk to our school also did a talk to parents, trying to get the stupid few who didn't get it to try to understand why children should be fastened in. He told a true story of a man who collected his 3 dc's from his ExW for the weekend. None of the dc's wore seatbelts, the car crashed - not throught the drivers fault - all dc's died. Coroners report was that if they had seatbelts on, all of them would have survived.

Personally, I think YANBU (but maybe a little OTT to involve police) Maybe your council could provide you with a leaflet that you could put under her windscreen wiper.

CheekyPinkSox · 20/05/2010 16:58

No matter how many adverts of accidents, or newspaper/magazine articles about strapping children in is going to make the amount of people in the UK use seatbelts for their children. Some thinks its ok to just place them in the bck of the car, maybe thinking its only round the corner.

YABU to place a note on it but if you see it again, then i would place a note on it.

biddysmama · 20/05/2010 16:59

yanbu... i'm still trying to decide whether to mention something to the mum of the 3 kids whos dad and gf picked them up on friday in a van with 3 seats in the front...

MadamDeathstare · 20/05/2010 16:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chandon · 20/05/2010 17:02

I think phoning the police is crazy OTT

Original poster
bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 17:04

Yes, but what do you think about leaving a note Chandon. Phoning the police is another two steps away.

OP posts:
MadamDeathstare · 20/05/2010 17:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fearnelinen · 20/05/2010 17:12

YABU, it's none of your business. Are you saying if you don't and they die it will be your fault?

ticktockclock · 20/05/2010 17:13

Saw someone yestderday whilst waiting in traffic with a little boy that looked about 4 years old not strapped in and roaming the back seats...but hey ho what do you do...the police is OTT.
A kindly note (no mention of the authorities) maybe...

MadamDeathstare · 20/05/2010 17:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Onestonetogo · 20/05/2010 17:16

where I live I see more children in cars with no seatbelt than the other way round.

Original poster
bibbitybobbityhat · 20/05/2010 17:18

I don't want to think about those little kids dying thanks Fearne.

This brings up the old dilemma over when and how other members of society step in to protect a child, doesn't it?

I just feel so fucking angry with that woman. How dare she risk their lives like that? And with her proud "Grandma's Taxi" sign in the back window too.

Grrrrrrrrr.

OP posts:
TakeLovingChances · 20/05/2010 17:19

I'm 25 and my mum said car seats were only just coming 'in' around the time I was born.

My grandmother the other day asked if we carried 11 week old DS on our laps when we're in the car as that's what they used to do when our parents were little.

OP, I can 100% see your concern for those LOs you say, it's a pity their gran wasn't more worried about them

YANBU.