Who gets the weekend lie-in? I need the MN jury to decide

[tortoiseonthehalfshell]

Right. Situation is this.

Our 'weekend' is only Saturdays - every other day one of us has to get to work. So only one day possible for someone to have a lie-in. Sundays we all get up together at around 7am, split the morning routine, and he heads off to work around 8am.

The rest of the week, I am up and out of the house before daughter and husband get up. I leave at 7am, he gets up when she wakes, which is anyway from 7 to 8am. He looks after her some days and does daycare drop-off the other days. So he is responsible for the morning routine; nappy change, breakfast, packing bags and bottles and things.

So come Saturday, I say, I want the lie-in because I get up earlier. He says, he wants the lie-in because he does the morning routine with her every other day and wants a morning off.

So who gets the lie-in? If it makes any difference, neither of us would ever take the piss and lie-in past about 9 am. But, dammit, that couple of hours is important.

You know the answer to this, tortoise - turn and turn about. So you get a lie-in every second weekend, without grumping.

Can you not alternate weeks, so you get the lie in one week and him the next? Seems pretty even; you get up earlier but he does most of the morning routine with the kids.

Yep, you take turns. Tis only fair

yep, you each get a layin every second weekend.

also, when me and dh have to do this when he works 6 days, one of us has the layin, one of us has a sneeky nap later in the day

you both work hard, you both deserve a lay in. You getting up slightly earlier than him in the week is not the point and makes it sound liek you dont appreciate he also works hard looking after your dd - I'm sure that isnt the case btw, but can see how it would make him feel.

Alternate weeks are the only way. How old are the kids? DS can operate the DVD player and get his own cereal now - is bliss. Though mostly he plays with his Lego and gets himself some snacks. Or comes and snuggles up.

She's coming up to 18 months, and inclined to grumpiness in the morning, so no, that's not an option, it's all nappy changing and trying to cook toast with her underfoot around here.

I appreciate him massively, gingernut, and I promise I lavish him with praise. It's just slightly galling to give him the lie in when every morning I have to get up in the cold and leave him warm and snoozing in bed and then he ALSO gets the Saturday.

I do know you're all right. Curse the lot of you.

You were all MEANT to say that clearly the lie-in was mine all mine.

Hmmmph.

Sorry, I agree with the others.

Sorry, but the sisterhood do appreciate the brotherhood when they pull their weight...and it does sound as though your DP is doing his fair share

So yes, taking it in turns, tis the only way...!

(I'm bookmarking to see how long it takes until some smartarse holier than thou type someone comes along to tell you that since you work all week you should want to get up and spend time with DD every Sat morning....!!! )

okay so he gets an extra what half hour in bed on weekdays yeah? But you've said yourself how stressful mornings are with your dd at the moment, do you have tea breaks, lunch breaks etc at work? Does that make it seem fairer?

Your situation is incredibly similar to mine, although sadly our lie-in days aren't as frequent as once a week!

Every time there is opportunity, I give dp the lie in, and around 10/11am he'll get up and if I need it, I'll go for a nap. Sometimes he'll get up and allow me the lie in, and then I'll get up later and offer him a nap.

YOU should want to get up and spend time with her as you are at work all week!!

for fillybuster....

Actually I think you should get 2 to his 1. He does get to stay in bed later than you 5 days a week and he gets more 'slow' mornings than you!

i am not even reading the op
imo this " my turn your turn" ethos just breeds resentment.
you need to agree to just let him happen or both get up.
i think leading by example i the best way to change habits long term

Go to bed ridiculously early instead.

Works for us.

In my house neither of us has a lie-in.

DH works away mon-fri and I am at home with dd (10) and ds (7).

Sat is gymnastics for both dcs, we go together, it starts at 9.00

Sun is swimming for ds, starts at 9.00 and horseriding for dd, starts at 9.30.

We are all up by 7.30 both mornings. except ds who gets up at 6 but will now make his own breakfast and settles down watching bbc iplayer until we get up.

and its my turn sounds so shit

But Su that just means we play head-under-pillow chicken every Saturday. Course I've taught DD to play "find Daddy's head under the pillow"but still.

Gingernut, nope, I'm a lawyer and I work long days. But really I do know it's fair. It's just COLD in the mornings now and DARK and none of you care.

go to bed earlier.
it will pass
stop being a teenager.
there!

you need to look a why you are so lazy tired the pair of you.

Oh i know it's a disgrace wanting to sleep in till 9 one morning a week. don't know i'm born, me.

Why can't you have a lie in on Sunday until he leaves the house? he he gets up and does the moring routine on Sunday you get a lie in until 8am?

he gets the lie in on Saturday?

well i never did ( obv makes me closer to god)
i think you just have to grin and bear it. but if turns work for oyu then do turns..

plan something fab so at least one of you wants to get up - swimming v good as pools all open at 7am

grand prix also good bargaining tool

Ah, tortiose...... I care!

I care that you bust yor boobs to get it together and out of the house before DD and DH are even up!

Been there myself and I don't miss the dark, cold drives to work at all!